Bar Chart

Band 5+: the chart below shows the number of people employed in five type of work in one region of Australia in 2001 and 2008

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The image presents a bar chart comparing numbers of people employed in sales, accounting, computing, nursing, and farming within one Australian region in 2001 and 2008: sales- 2001: approximately 155, 2008: approximately 170; accounting- 2001: approximately 70, 2008: approximately 80; computing- 2001: approximately 40, 2008: approximately 130; nursing- 2001: approximately 55, 2008: approximately 75; farming- 2001: approximately 25, 2008: approximately 15.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The bar chart illustrates how many people employeed in five different sectors in a particular region of Australia.

Overall, there were a slight increase in the number of employees, in sales, computing and nursing. Whereas there were a minor decrease, in the sector of accounting and farming, at the end of the period. In addition, sales sector employeed the most people, while farming employeed the least.

In 2001, individuals who engaged with sales was 160,000, significantly outnumbering as the most popular sector. Meanwhile, sectors known as accounting, computing and nursing were employeed around 60,000 people. In contrast, in 2001, farming was the least one, with 20,000 employees.

Turning to 2008, employees of the sector of sale, witnessed a slight escelate, ending with approximately 180.000 people. Computing and nursing followed similar upward trends, growing to nearly 80,000 and 60,000, respectively. In contrast, declining can be seen in the sector of farming and accounting workforces, with a minor falling to just under 60,000 and to just below 20,000

Word Count: 166

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Overall Band Score

5.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

sector: 5

people: 4

employeed: 4

farming: 4

sales: 3

computing: 3

nursing: 3

accounting: 3

60000: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report effectively addresses the task by describing the main trends and comparing the data across the five sectors. The overall structure is clear, with an introduction, an overview, and detailed paragraphs for each year. However, there are some inaccuracies in the data (e.g., sales in 2001 reported as 160,000 instead of approximately 155, and computing in 2008 reported as 80,000 instead of approximately 130). Additionally, there are minor grammatical errors and awkward phrasing (e.g., 'employeed', 'esc elate', 'declining can be seen'). To improve, focus on accurate data representation and proofread for language precision.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report has a clear overall structure with an introduction, an overview, and paragraphs for each time period. However, the cohesion is sometimes disrupted by awkward phrasing and unclear references (e.g., 'individuals who engaged with sales was 160,000' and 'sectors known as accounting, computing and nursing were employeed around 60,000 people'). The use of linking words is basic, and some sentences feel disjointed. To improve, use a wider range of cohesive devices (e.g., 'similarly', 'in contrast', 'as for') and ensure each paragraph focuses on a clear main idea with smooth transitions between sentences.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary is adequate but limited and sometimes inaccurate or inappropriate. For example, 'employeed' is used incorrectly (should be 'employed'), 'escelate' is a misspelling of 'escalate', and 'declining can be seen' is awkward. There is some attempt at paraphrasing (e.g., 'witnessed a slight escelate'), but it is not always successful. To improve, expand your range of topic-specific vocabulary (e.g., 'rose steadily', 'experienced a decline', 'remained the highest') and ensure correct word forms and collocations. Avoid informal or vague terms like 'the least one'.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains several grammatical errors that affect clarity, such as subject-verb agreement ('there were a slight increase'), incorrect verb forms ('people employeed', 'sector employeed'), and missing articles ('a minor decrease, in the sector of accounting'). Punctuation is inconsistent (e.g., use of commas and periods). Sentence structures are mostly simple, with limited use of complex sentences. To improve, practice using a mix of simple, compound, and complex sentences accurately, and proofread for common errors in verb tense, agreement, and punctuation.

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Band 5+: the chart below shows the number of people employed in five type of work in one region of Australia in 2001 and 2008

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Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

Answers On The Same Topic:

the chart below shows the number of people employed in five type of work in one region of Australia in 2001 and 2008

the chart below shows the number of people employed in five type of work in one region of Australia in 2001 and 2008

the chart below shows the number of people employed in five type of work in one region of Australia in 2001 and 2008

the chart below shows the number of people employed in five type of work in one region of Australia in 2001 and 2008

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Generate A Band-9 Sample Answer?

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