Pie Chart

Band 5+: The chart below shows the proportion of immigrants from various regions and countries working in Australia in 1991.

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Image for topic: The chart below shows the proportion of immigrants from various regions and countries working in Australia in 1991.

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The image depicts a pie chart of the immigrant labor force in Australia by region or country of birth for 1991, with Europe accounting for 62%, Asia 17%, New Zealand 9%, North Africa and the Middle East 4%, America 3%, and Other regions 5%.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The pie chart illustrates the number of immigrants from different regions and countries working in Australia in 1991.

Overall, in general, immigrants came from various regions and countries such as Europe and Asia continent, New Zealand, North Africa and the Middle East, America and other countries. The highest level of immigrants came from Europe during this period. After the second stage evident that the Asia. Others exactly similar figure immigrants working in Australia.

The most proportions of immigrants came from Europe and 62% people working in Australia. Also, Asian immigrants almost 20% people working these countries. New Zealand countries situated third place which 9% immigrants. Other countries remained who want to working in Australia but statistic shows that the only 5% people which lowest than Europe and Asia continet as well as New Zealand country.

However, the lowest level of immigrants in America where people only 3% person working in Australia. In addition, the last region is North Africa and the Middle East where 4% people left for working in Australia during in 1991.

Word Count: 174

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Overall Band Score

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Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

immigrants: 8

working: 7

countries: 6

australia: 5

people: 5

europe: 4

zealand: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report generally addresses the task, but there are some issues with organization, accuracy, and language. The overview is present but could be more concise and focused. The body paragraphs contain some inaccuracies in the data reported and the language used is not always clear or accurate. To improve, focus on providing precise data from the chart, organizing the information logically, and using more accurate and formal language.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report lacks clear organization and transitions between ideas. The structure feels somewhat disjointed, making it difficult to follow the main points. Consider using more cohesive devices (e.g., conjunctions, pronouns, synonyms) to link sentences and paragraphs. Improve paragraphing by grouping related information together and ensuring each paragraph has a clear focus. Avoid redundant phrases like 'Overall, in general.' Focus on presenting the information in a logical sequence, perhaps starting with the largest group and moving to the smallest.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is basic and lacks precision. There is repetition of words and phrases (e.g., 'immigrants,' 'working in Australia'). Try to use a wider range of vocabulary to describe the data more accurately and avoid redundancy. For example, instead of repeatedly using 'people working in Australia,' consider using synonyms like 'Australian workforce,' 'employed immigrants,' or 'immigrant workers.' Also, be careful with word choice; for instance, 'continent' is not always necessary when referring to regions.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains numerous grammatical errors, including incorrect verb tenses, subject-verb agreement issues, and awkward sentence structures. There are also issues with article usage (e.g., 'the Asia') and preposition usage (e.g., 'during in 1991'). Focus on improving sentence structure and ensuring grammatical accuracy. Proofread carefully to identify and correct errors. Consider using simpler sentence structures to avoid errors, and gradually introduce more complex structures as your accuracy improves.

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