Bar Chart

Band 6+: The chart shows population of selected European countries in 2013 and 2021

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The image displays a bar graph comparing population in millions of selected European countries between 2013 and 2021, with two bars representing each year for every country; Germany's population declined from 80.6 to 83.2, Spain increased from 46.6 to 47.4, France from 65.8 to 67.7, Croatia decreased from 4.3 to 4, Italy dropped from 60.2 to 59.1, and Poland's population decreased from 10.5 to 10.3.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The provided bar chart illustrates the population of chosen countries in Europe between 2013 and 2021.

Overall, it is evident that population of Germany was higher in both two years than the other categories, while population of Croatia accounted for the lowest percentage. By contrast, populations of Germany, Spain and France rose gradually over the years, whereas that of Croatia, Italy, Poland and Portugal declined relatively. In addition, German people recorded the highest increase.

In Germany, the percentage of individuals stood at approximately 80,6 million in 2013, before increasing to about 83,2 million in 2021. By comparison, in 2013 the population of Spain’s people was at around 46,6 million, the percentage of people then rose to about 47,4 million, increasing just only 0.8 milion , respectively. Unlike the figure for France in 2013, which stood at 63,8 million , the figure for France in 2021 increased to around 67.7 million.

The downward trend recoded in Croatia, Italy, Poland and Portugal. In 2013, the proportion of population of Croatia recorded the lowest figure, standing at 4,3 million , before decreasing to roughly 4 million . Similarly, the percentage of Italian people was at 60,2 million in 2013, then the figure rose slightly to 59,1 million in 2021. Accounting for 38 million people in Poland in 2013, people’s population experienced a decline insignificantly to around 37,7 million , decreasing just only 0,3 million . Meanwhile, Portugal’s population showed about 10,5 million in 2013, the proportion of population fell to 10,3 million

Word Count: 249

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Overall Band Score

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Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

million: 14

population: 8

people: 5

croatia: 4

percentage: 4

figure: 4

germany: 3

france: 3

poland: 3

about: 3

around: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report adequately addresses the task by describing the main trends and comparing the countries. However, there are some inaccuracies and omissions: the data for Poland and Portugal are incorrect (Poland's population is given as 38 million instead of 10.5, and Portugal is not mentioned in the visual description). Additionally, the report mentions Portugal, which is not in the data, and misstates the trend for Italy (says 'rose slightly' when it decreased). The overall structure is clear, but the language could be more precise and the data more accurate. To improve, ensure all figures are correctly reported and avoid introducing countries not in the chart.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report has a clear overall structure with an introduction, overview, and body paragraphs. However, the flow is sometimes disrupted by awkward phrasing and unclear referencing (e.g., 'the percentage of individuals', 'the percentage of people then rose'). The use of cohesive devices is limited and sometimes inaccurate (e.g., 'By comparison' is used incorrectly). Paragraphing is present but could be more effectively managed to separate trends clearly. To improve, ensure each paragraph has a clear central topic and use a wider range of linking words accurately.

Lexical Resource

The report uses some appropriate vocabulary for describing trends (e.g., 'increased', 'decreased', 'stood at', 'accounted for'). However, there is repetition and imprecise word choices (e.g., 'percentage of individuals' for population, 'rose slightly' for a decrease). The range of vocabulary is limited, and some phrases are awkward (e.g., 'increasing just only 0.8 milion'). To improve, use more precise and varied vocabulary (e.g., 'witnessed a rise', 'experienced a decline', 'remained stable') and avoid informal or incorrect expressions.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains a mix of simple and complex sentences, but there are numerous grammatical errors and punctuation issues that affect clarity. Examples include subject-verb agreement ('population of Germany was higher'), incorrect verb forms ('rose slightly' for a decrease), and missing articles ('the population of chosen countries'). Punctuation is inconsistent (e.g., use of commas and periods). To improve, focus on sentence structure, ensure subject-verb agreement, and proofread for punctuation and spelling errors (e.g., 'milion' should be 'million').

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