Bar Chart

Band 5+: The chart shows the percentage of households having different goods in a country in Europe in 2004 and 2008.

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Image for topic: The chart shows the percentage of households having different goods in a country in Europe in 2004 and 2008.

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The image displays a bar chart with values for 2004 and 2008. Data points are as follows (2004, 2008): Microwave (64, 70); CD player (78, 74); Mobile phone (30, 84); Clothes dryer (60, 66); Dish washer (25, 30); TV (93, 97); Telephone (91, 92); Home computer (38, 76).

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The bar chart illustrates the proportion of families having different electronical devices in the country in Europe in the year of 2004 and 2008.

Overall, the proportion of TV users was on the top in 2008. Furthermore, the percentage of TV and telephone users were the same rate in the year of 2004. In 2004, except TV users, other electronic things were higher proportion compared to the year of 2008.

In 2004, compared to the mobile phone users in the houses accounting for 30%, the clothes dryer making up nearly 60%. Dishwashes were the lowest percentage followed by 2004 and 2008, accounting for 20% and 30% respectively. In 2008, the percentage of mobile phone users increased to nearly 90%, surpassing the year of 2004 which was 30%. In 2004, the computer used by families around 38%, representing for the two fold increase the year of 2008.

Word Count: 146

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Overall Band Score

5.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B1 - Intermediate
Using more sophisticated words could be beneficial.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

users: 5

proportion: 3

percentage: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report adequately addresses the task by summarizing the information presented in the bar chart. The overview is acceptable, and the report highlights key trends and specific data points. However, there are some inaccuracies and omissions. For example, the report states that "except TV users, other electronic things were higher proportion compared to the year of 2008", which is not entirely accurate. Also, the mobile phone percentage in 2008 is not nearly 90%. To improve, ensure all data references are accurate and include more comparative statements to fully meet the task requirements. The report falls short of the required 150 words.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report demonstrates some organization, but the flow of information is not always smooth. The introduction is adequate, but the overview could be more concise and impactful. The body paragraphs contain some comparisons, but they lack clear topic sentences and transitions, making it difficult to follow the main points. Consider using more cohesive devices to link ideas within and between paragraphs. For example, use transition words like 'however,' 'in contrast,' 'similarly,' and 'furthermore' more effectively to guide the reader through the data.

Lexical Resource

The report uses a limited range of vocabulary, with some inaccuracies and awkward phrasing. For example, 'electronical devices' could be improved to 'electronic devices' or 'household appliances.' The use of 'proportion,' 'percentage,' and 'rate' is repetitive and sometimes inaccurate. Try to incorporate a wider range of vocabulary related to trends and comparisons, such as 'increased significantly,' 'remained stable,' 'a smaller fraction,' or 'a larger segment.' Also, pay attention to the correct usage of prepositions and articles. Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains numerous grammatical errors that affect clarity and understanding. There are issues with verb tense, subject-verb agreement, article usage, and sentence structure. For example, 'TV users was on the top' should be 'TV usage was highest.' 'Electronic things were higher proportion' is grammatically incorrect and unclear. 'Dishwashes were the lowest percentage followed by 2004 and 2008' is awkward and needs restructuring. Focus on improving your understanding and application of basic grammar rules. Proofread carefully to identify and correct errors before submitting your work.

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Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

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