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Band 7+: The charts detail the proportions of Australian secondary school graduates who were unemployed,employed or further education in 1980,1990 and 2000.

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The image depicts three pie charts that represent the proportions of unemployed, employed, and further education-seeking Australian secondary school graduates in 1980, 1990, and 2000. In 1980, 50% were employed, 40% in further education, and 10% unemployed. In 1990, 50% were employed, 38% in further education, and 12% unemployed. In 2000, 55% were employed, 37% in further education, and 8% unemployed.

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The pie charts give information about the percentage of Australian secondary school leavers who were jobless, employed or went further education from 1980, 1990 and 2000. It is evident that the number of students who pursued further education dropped significantly over the period, while the opposite patter could be seen for those who participated in the workforce. In addition, the figure for those who remained unemployed fluctuated minimally.

At the beginning of the period, around 50% of Australian graduates chose further education as their future path, which was the highest at that time. After one period, this level decreased significantly to 38% in 1990, and finished at 37% in 2000. In contrast, this rate for employment experienced an upward trend. 40% of school leavers joined the workforce in 1980, at which point this rate increased to 50 % in 1990, surpassed that for further education and ended at 50% at the end of the period.

Regarding the unemployment rate, unlike the two previous categories, it remained relatively stable. Starting at 10% in 1980, this level went up to 12% in 1990 before going back to 8% at the end of the period.

Word Count: 192

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Overall Band Score

7.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

further: 4

education: 4

period: 4

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report effectively summarizes the information presented in the pie charts, noting key trends and changes over the given period. The description is clear and well-organized, with appropriate comparisons and contrasts. To further enhance the response, consider including specific data points to support the identified trends, providing a more comprehensive overview.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report is generally well-organized and easy to follow. The information is presented logically, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a discernible overall structure. Transitions between sentences and paragraphs are generally smooth, contributing to the flow of the report. To further enhance coherence, consider using more varied cohesive devices to link ideas and improve the overall connectivity of the text. For example, you could use conjunctions, pronouns, or lexical repetition to create stronger connections between sentences and paragraphs.

Lexical Resource

The report demonstrates a good range of vocabulary, appropriate for the task. The writer effectively uses synonyms and avoids repetition by employing different words to describe similar concepts. To further enhance lexical resource, consider incorporating more specific and nuanced vocabulary related to employment, education, and economic trends. This would add depth and precision to the analysis.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report demonstrates a good command of grammar, with a variety of sentence structures used accurately. There are only a few minor errors that do not significantly impede understanding. To further improve grammatical accuracy, pay close attention to subject-verb agreement, correct tense usage, and the appropriate use of articles and prepositions. Reviewing and editing the report carefully can help identify and correct these minor errors.

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Band 7+: The charts detail the proportions of Australian secondary school graduates who were unemployed,employed or further education in 1980,1990 and 2000.

Check Your Answer On This Topic?

Generate A Band-9 Sample Answer?

Overall Band Score

Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

Answers On The Same Topic:

The charts detail the proportions of Australian secondary school graduates who were unemployed,employed or further education in 1980,1990 and 2000.

The charts detail the proportions of Australian secondary school graduates who were unemployed,employed or further education in 1980,1990 and 2000.

The charts detail the proportions of Australian secondary school graduates who were unemployed,employed or further education in 1980,1990 and 2000.

The charts detail the proportions of Australian secondary school graduates who were unemployed,employed or further education in 1980,1990 and 2000.

Other Topics:

The pie chart below shows the worldwide distribution of private insurance policies. The table shows the private insurance policy ownership of three countries. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The charts show (illustrate, depict, delineate, indicate, present, represent) the time spent on two devices according to various categories.

The charts show (illustrate, depict, delineate, indicate, present, represent) the time spent on two devices according to various categories.

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