Process Diagram

Band 5+: The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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Image for topic: The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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The image cannot be described as requested because it contains no numerical data points, percentages, trends, or any specific sections, countries, or categories. It's a diagram illustrating the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane with ten steps depicted as images with brief descriptions, including growing, harvesting, crushing, boiling, centrifuging, and drying processes.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The diagram illustrates the process of manufacturing sugar from sugar canes.

Overall, the process by which manufacturing sugar is a multistage linear process, which consisting of seven stages: collected, processing, and dry.

In the initial stage, sugar canes taken time from 12 to 18 months for grow, in the second stage, sugar canes are harvested by manually or machine. Afterward, collected sugar canes are taken into factory, where they are crushed into liquid juice by a machine. Next, juice is poured into limestone filter, where they are purified by a filter.

Subsequently, these purifying juice taken into evaporator, which are heated by fire and make from juice to liquid syrup, then taken to a centrifuge machine, where they are separated according from liquid syrup to sugar. In the last and final stage, sugars are taken to a place, where they are dried and cooled into a container and distributed into the markets, where peoples can able to buy them.

Word Count: 159

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Overall Band Score

5.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

sugar: 7

taken: 5

where: 5

juice: 4

process: 3

which: 3

stage: 3

canes: 3

machine: 3

liquid: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report provides a general overview of the sugar manufacturing process, but it includes some inaccuracies and lacks detail in certain areas. To improve, focus on providing more specific information about each stage of the process and ensuring the accuracy of the details presented. Also, pay attention to the organization of your report to ensure a clear and logical flow of information.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report provides a general overview of the sugar manufacturing process, but the organization could be improved. The flow of information is somewhat disjointed, and transitions between stages could be smoother. Consider using more cohesive devices to link ideas and ensure a clearer progression through the process. Paragraphing is generally adequate, but could be refined to better reflect the different stages of the process.

Lexical Resource

The report uses adequate vocabulary to describe the sugar manufacturing process. However, there is room for improvement in terms of lexical precision and variety. Try to incorporate more specific and technical terms related to the process to enhance the description. For example, instead of 'taken into factory,' you could use 'transported to the processing plant.' Pay attention to vocabulary repetition to improve the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains several grammatical errors that affect clarity. Errors in verb tense, subject-verb agreement, and article usage are present. For example, 'sugar canes taken time from 12 to 18 months for grow' and 'these purifying juice taken into evaporator' contain grammatical inaccuracies. Focus on improving grammatical accuracy by reviewing basic grammar rules and proofreading carefully. Vary sentence structures to demonstrate a wider range of grammatical control.

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