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Band 5+: The diagram shows differences in the infrastructure of London from 1995 until present

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The image shows two maps side by side, one from 1995 and the other from the present, depicting the transformation of certain areas. In 1995, there were housing in the northwest corner, farmland in the northeast, a forest park centrally located, and a hotel at the southeast corner of the forest park. Along the southern coast, there was a fishing port, a fish market, a shop, and a cafe aligned from west to east. In the present map, the farmland has been replaced by a golf area and the forest park remains. Housing is still in the northwest, with an additional car park next to the hotel, a restaurant instead of the shop, and apartments replacing the fish market, with the fishing port no longer shown. The cafe is still in the same position. Tennis courts have been added east of the forest park.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The report points towards the differences in both diagrams, in terms of infrastructure. The task is to display the various comparisons between the time period of 1995 to the present.

Firstly, in the present time, the housing has been increased, the farmland has become a golf playground. The forest park has turned in to a tennis field, whilst the area with shops has been replaced with restaurants. The hotel also consists of a car park, the fish market has been converted in to an apartment complex and more. Moreover, the fishing port has been completely destroyed.

Secondly, in 1995, the number of houses is precisely 12 and the quantity of homes in the present have expanded to 16. Meanwhile in 1995, a huge chunk of the beach was obstructed by the sea port and now with the removal of it, the sea is empty. The only thing that was left unchanged, was the cafe. Another noteworthy interest is that, the farmland was separate from the forest park and now in the current time, it has been merged with the golf land.

Word Count: 181

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B1 - Intermediate
Using more sophisticated words could be beneficial.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:
No noticeable repetition! Great job!

Task Response

The report attempts to describe the changes between the two maps, but it contains inaccuracies and omissions. The description of the forest park turning into a tennis field is incorrect, and the report misses key details such as the addition of tennis courts and the car park. The language is also quite basic and repetitive. To improve, focus on accurately describing all the changes shown in the diagrams and use more precise language.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report lacks a clear structure and logical flow. The introduction is weak and doesn't effectively set the stage for the comparison. The body paragraphs are disorganized, jumping between different features and time periods without clear transitions. The use of cohesive devices is limited, making it difficult for the reader to follow the comparisons. Consider organizing the report by area or feature, and using transition words to connect ideas and improve coherence.

Lexical Resource

The report demonstrates a limited range of vocabulary, with some inaccuracies and inappropriate word choices. For example, 'golf playground' and 'tennis field' are not the most accurate or natural ways to describe those features. The vocabulary used to describe the changes is also quite basic. Try to use more precise and varied vocabulary to describe the transformations, such as 'redeveloped,' 'converted,' or 'expanded.' Also, pay attention to the correct usage of prepositions and articles. Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains several grammatical errors, including incorrect verb tenses, subject-verb agreement issues, and awkward sentence structures. For example, 'the housing has been increased' and 'the forest park has turned in to a tennis field' are grammatically incorrect. The sentences are often long and convoluted, making it difficult to understand the intended meaning. Focus on using a variety of sentence structures, but ensure they are grammatically correct and clear. Proofread carefully to identify and correct errors in grammar and punctuation.

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