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Band 5+: The diagrama below give information about a plan to redevelop an industrial site

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Image for topic: The diagrama below give information about a plan to redevelop an industrial site

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The image displays two plans for an industrial site bordered by Chimney Road (North), Pie Walk (East), Swallow Street (South), and Toe Lane (West), with a compass indicating directions. The 'industrial site now' plan features a northern Entrance and reception, an eastern Factory, a central Yard, a western circular Parking area, a southwestern Storage building, and a southern row with 6 Offices and 1 Canteen. The 'development plan: new housing' diagram shows new structures including a 3 bedroom house (NW), a 4 bedroom house (SW), three separate 2 bedroom houses (N), a Parking area (NE), and an Apartment building (SE). This new plan incorporates a central Communal gardens area, a Private road south of the gardens, Parking Garages south of that road, and two vertical private roads separating the perimeter buildings from the central area.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The diagrams introduce about a new redevelop an industrial site.

Now there is a lot of empty and open spaces which is comfortable to walk, relax and also places where you can chat with your colleagues. There are small amount of offices next to the Swallow Street in addition there is canteen below the offices which is obviously very comfortable. Toe Lane including small parking zone for cars, below the parking zone there is a storage for tools plus unnecessary stuff. In the corner of Ple Walk located factory next to the offices and canteen. From Chimney Road you can come into there is reception.

In the development plan we can see the big apartments Chimney Road site including 3 houses each for two persons below the houses big communal gardens. Toe Lane and Ple Walk has the same size places bot one for people one for comfort of people. Swallow Street including only parking garages.

In conclusion the diagram gives information about two industrial site one for work one for people both are important in our life

Word Count: 178

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

there: 5

offices: 3

below: 3

including: 3

parking: 3

people: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report generally addresses the requirements of the task, but there are some issues with organization, accuracy, and detail. The description of the 'industrial site now' plan is somewhat clear, but the description of the 'development plan' lacks detail and clarity. The report also includes some irrelevant or inaccurate information. To improve, focus on providing a more detailed and accurate description of both plans, highlighting the key changes and features. Also, ensure that the information presented is relevant and well-organized.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report lacks clear organization and transitions between ideas. The description of the 'industrial site now' plan is somewhat disorganized, and the transition to the 'development plan' is abrupt. The final paragraph is a very general conclusion and doesn't effectively summarize the changes. To improve coherence, use clear topic sentences for each paragraph and transition words to connect ideas. For example, you could start a new paragraph for each distinct area of the industrial site or each type of change in the development plan. Also, ensure the conclusion summarizes the main changes and their impact.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is basic and lacks precision. There are instances of vague language, such as 'empty and open spaces,' 'small amount of offices,' 'unnecessary stuff,' and 'big apartments.' To improve, use more specific and descriptive vocabulary related to site layouts and development plans. For example, instead of 'empty and open spaces,' you could say 'underutilized open areas' or 'undeveloped land.' Instead of 'big apartments,' you could say 'large apartment buildings' or 'multi-story residential complex.'

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains numerous grammatical errors, including incorrect verb tenses ('diagrams introduce'), subject-verb agreement issues ('there is a lot of empty spaces'), incorrect preposition usage ('offices next to the Swallow Street,' 'canteen below the offices'), and awkward phrasing ('Toe Lane including small parking zone'). These errors affect the clarity and accuracy of the report. To improve, carefully proofread your work for grammatical errors and consider using a grammar checker. Focus on using correct verb tenses, subject-verb agreement, and preposition usage. Also, practice writing complex sentences to demonstrate a wider range of grammatical structures.

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