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Band 4+: The diagrams below show changes that have taken place in the Sawry District neighbourhood since 1920.

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Image for topic: The diagrams below show changes that have taken place in the Sawry District neighbourhood since 1920.

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The image displays two maps of the Sawry District, one from 1920 and one from 2020. The 1920 map features a cannery by the Elmwood River, a beach, Prestwich Primary School, Miller's Lake, Oak Avenue, apartments, houses, and shops symbolized by respective icons. The 2020 map shows the Yang Office Complex, Elmwood River with a bridge and bike path, Oak Avenue, a petrol station, Miller's Lake, and Prestwich Primary school with modernized icons.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The maps illustrate changes taken place in Sawry district neighbourhood in 1920 and 2020 years.

Overall, ten decades period changes a lot of things. The most changes was Tulebug Bros. Cannery converted into Yang Office Complex in the west.

In 1920, the beach in notheast was demolished. Afterward two opposite side connected with bridge, individuals can walk on foot there. Some houses had tranformed into apartments. Other houses removed, because the new road built to connected with new opposite place.

In southwest had been Prestwich Primary school earlier, then moved in south. Lonoco Petrol Station was built in that place. And also some trees cutted down near at the school. On the Oak Avenue road had been 2 houses and 1 shop in 1920, therefore in 2020 transformed into new 2 big apartments, 2 shops, 3 houses. In 2020 had a big changes in a good way modern and new better.

Word Count: 151

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Overall Band Score

4.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B1 - Intermediate
Using more sophisticated words could be beneficial.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

changes: 4

houses: 4

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report addresses the task, but there are some inaccuracies and a tendency to list changes rather than provide a cohesive overview. The organization could be improved for clarity. To improve, focus on grouping similar changes together and providing more specific details with accurate data from the maps. Also, avoid subjective opinions like 'in a good way modern and new better'.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report lacks clear organization and logical flow. The description of changes is somewhat disjointed, and the connections between different parts of the district are not always clear. Consider using more cohesive devices to link ideas and improve the overall structure of the report. For example, use transition words to indicate sequence, contrast, or addition.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is basic and lacks precision. There are instances of inappropriate word choice and a limited range of vocabulary. To improve, try to use more specific and varied vocabulary related to urban development and changes in infrastructure. For example, instead of 'changes a lot of things,' use more descriptive phrases like 'underwent significant transformation' or 'experienced substantial redevelopment.' Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains numerous grammatical errors, including incorrect verb tenses, subject-verb agreement issues, and awkward sentence structures. These errors significantly impede understanding. Focus on improving your understanding and application of basic grammar rules. Proofread carefully to identify and correct errors before submitting your work.

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