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Band 5+: The graph below shows the percentage of 18-25 year olds in universities in four different countries. Summarise the information by selection and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

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Image for topic: The graph below shows the percentage of 18-25 year olds in universities in four different countries. Summarise the information by selection and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

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The image shows a graph detailing university attendance percentages of 18-25-year-olds in 4 countries from 1961 to 2011: Singapore (solid line), Malaysia (dotted line), Philippines (dashed line), Thailand (dash-dot line). In 1961: Singapore ~12%, Malaysia ~1%, Philippines ~10%, Thailand ~1%. In 1971: Singapore ~28%, Malaysia ~3%, Philippines ~14%, Thailand ~2%. In 1981: Singapore ~25%, Malaysia ~5%, Philippines ~18%, Thailand ~4%. In 1991: Singapore ~25%, Malaysia ~9%, Philippines ~22%, Thailand ~7%. In 2001: Singapore ~30%, Malaysia ~12%, Philippines ~24%, Thailand ~16%. In 2011: Singapore >35%, Malaysia ~28%, Philippines ~30%, Thailand ~18%.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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Note: Both the topic and the answer were created by one of our users.

The ligne graph delineates the propotion of people attending university with an age around eighteen and twenty_five in four different countries.

Overall, the percentage of students who went to university in both Singapore and Thailand was fluctuating throughout the period given, whereas in Malaysia and Philippines it was growing steadly.

Back to the details, in 1961, there was 15% of students in Singaphore , almost 25% in Thailand, more than 5% in Philippines and less than 5% in Malaysia, reffering that thailandies cared more about knowledge back then. Thirty years later, university attendance in Singaphore growed with more than half compared with the previous years despite seeing a decrease in 1981, whereas, in Thailand the number showed a slight decrease with 5%, which can be the reason for weather problems or the quality of teaching. Looking at Malaysia and Phillippines they both saw a steady grow which attained 15% in 1991, indicating the developement of education.

In 2011, all countries showed an increase that arrived to more than half in Thailand. For both Singaphore and Malaysia the percentage outnumbered the one in 1991 by almost 5%, while there was no change in Phillipines. These variations demonstrates that number of students can grow with the stability of the situations or the politics going in the country they live in.

Word Count: 218

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Overall Band Score

5.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

thailand: 4

malaysia: 4

university: 3

students: 3

singaphore: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report attempts to address the task but contains inaccuracies and some irrelevant speculation. The data reporting is not always accurate, and the analysis includes subjective interpretations not directly supported by the graph. To improve, focus on accurately representing the data trends and avoid introducing external factors without clear evidence from the graph.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report demonstrates an adequate attempt to organize information, but the flow could be improved. The introduction and overall statement are present, but the body paragraphs lack clear topic sentences and transitions. The organization of details within paragraphs sometimes feels disjointed, making it harder to follow the comparisons and trends. Consider using more explicit transition words and phrases to guide the reader and improve the logical connection between ideas. For example, phrases like 'In contrast,' 'Similarly,' or 'By comparison' could be used to highlight differences and similarities between the countries' trends. Also, ensure each paragraph focuses on a specific aspect or time period to enhance clarity.

Lexical Resource

The report uses a mix of basic and more advanced vocabulary, but there are instances where word choice could be more precise and appropriate. For example, 'ligne graph' should be 'line graph,' and 'growed' should be 'grew.' While there is an attempt to use varied vocabulary, such as 'fluctuating' and 'attained,' the overall range could be expanded to enhance the description. Consider using synonyms for common words like 'increase' and 'decrease' to demonstrate a broader lexical range. Also, ensure that the vocabulary used is contextually accurate and relevant to the data being presented.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are noticeable grammatical errors that affect clarity. Subject-verb agreement errors, incorrect verb tenses ('growed' instead of 'grew'), and awkward phrasing ('reffering that thailandies cared more about knowledge back then') are present. While the report attempts to use a variety of sentence structures, the accuracy needs improvement. Focus on proofreading to identify and correct grammatical errors. Pay attention to verb tenses, subject-verb agreement, and correct use of prepositions and articles. Improving grammatical accuracy will enhance the overall clarity and credibility of the report.

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