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Band 5+: The graph below shows the rate of smoking per 1000 people in Someland from 1960 to 2000.

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Image for topic: The graph below shows the rate of smoking per 1000 people in Someland from 1960 to 2000.

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The image displays a line graph detailing the smoking rates per 1,000 people in Someland from 1960 to 2000. In 1960, men had a rate of 600, women 100. By 1965, men decreased to 575, women rose to 150. In 1970, men were at 550, women 200. By 1975, the rates were 500 for men and remained 250 for women. In 1980, men were 450, women 300. By 1985, men were 400, women 300. In 1990, men were 350, women 280. By 1995, men fell to 300, women 230. In 2000, men reached 250, women 200. Both genders show an overall declining trend, with men consistently higher than women.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The given line graph compares the smoking rates of two genders in Someland, over a 40-year period, measured in per 1000 people.

It is clearly illustrated that, although the figure for smoking males was higher than females at the start, this gap narrowed down towards the end of the survey and approximately overlapped with the smoking rate of girls. In contrast of fell in rates of male smokers for 40 consecutive years, females started to smoke more compared to start.

At the beginning of the survey, 60% of men smoked which was six times more than smoking women. Then the figure for the men first sligthly decreased to the levels under 600 and then experienced steady plummet and had reached 250 by 2000.

In 1960, women did not prefer smoke as much as the rates for male, before a sudden rise to 200 in 1965. Despite of staying stable until 1970, the figure went up abruptly to above 300, before constant decline to the level above 200 in 2000.

Word Count: 169

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Overall Band Score

5.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B1 - Intermediate
Using more sophisticated words could be beneficial.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

smoking: 4

rates: 3

figure: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report addresses the main trends and makes relevant comparisons between the two groups. However, there are some inaccuracies in data interpretation and expression. For instance, the report mentions that the rates 'overlapped,' which is not supported by the data provided, and uses '60%' when the data is given per 1000 people. Additionally, there are several grammatical errors and awkward phrasing (e.g., 'In contrast of fell in rates', 'Despite of staying stable') that occasionally hinder clarity. To improve, ensure that mathematical comparisons are precise and focus on improving sentence structure and grammatical accuracy when describing trends.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report follows a logical structure, but the progression of ideas is occasionally hindered by awkward phrasing and grammatical errors. While there is an attempt to use cohesive devices (e.g., 'In contrast', 'At the beginning'), some transitions are used incorrectly, such as 'In contrast of fell in rates'. To improve, ensure that linking words are used naturally and that the relationship between sentences is clear. Avoid starting sentences with fragments or using conjunctions that do not logically connect the clauses.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary range is somewhat limited and contains several inaccuracies. There are issues with word choice and collocation, such as 'smoking males' instead of 'male smokers', 'smoking women' instead of 'female smokers', and 'experienced steady plummet' (which should be 'a steady plummet'). Additionally, the term 'girls' is inappropriate for a report discussing adult smoking rates; 'women' or 'females' should be used. Aim to use more precise academic collocations and ensure that nouns and adjectives are used correctly in context. Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

Grammatical errors are frequent and occasionally impede the reader's understanding. There are issues with sentence structure (e.g., 'In contrast of fell in rates...'), preposition usage ('Despite of'), and verb forms ('did not prefer smoke'). There are also errors in subject-verb agreement and article usage. To improve, focus on mastering complex sentence structures and ensuring that basic grammatical rules, such as the use of gerunds and prepositions, are applied consistently.

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Band 5+: The graph below shows the rate of smoking per 1000 people in Someland from 1960 to 2000.

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Generate A Band-9 Sample Answer?

Overall Band Score

Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

Answers On The Same Topic:

The graph below shows the rate of smoking per 1000 people in Someland from 1960 to 2000.

The graph below shows the rate of smoking per 1000 people in Someland from 1960 to 2000.

The graph below shows the rate of smoking per 1000 people in Someland from 1960 to 2000.

The graph below shows the rate of smoking per 1000 people in Someland from 1960 to 2000.

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The graph shows the number of visitors to four international museums between 1980 and 2015. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Check Your Answer On This Topic?

Generate A Band-9 Sample Answer?

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Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

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Grammatical Range & Accuracy

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