Bar Chart

Band 4+: The graph illustrates trends in sport preference by gender in a given school.

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Image for topic: The graph illustrates trends in sport preference by gender in a given school.

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The image shows a bar chart comparing the number of boys and girls playing various sports: in Cycling, boys are at 30, girls at 40; in Tennis, boys are at 20, girls at 30; in Football, boys are at 40, girls at 20; in Swimming, boys are at 10, girls at 20.

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The bar chart compares the participation number of males and females children accross various sports in a School. Overall, girls have claim to have the maximum number of participation in cycling and football whereas boys have the highest participation in cycling. Furthermore the contribution of girls is more over all the sports than boys except swimming.

The most participated sports by Girls is cycling and football, they outnumber the boys by reaching the peak 40 on both.Similarly, in tennis also they outsmart boys in participating arround 30 , Then girls are not overwhelmed in swimming than boys. Here the contribution of girls are the highest in the sports.

In the contrast, The topmost involvement in sports for boys is swmming here they have overcome girls by increasing approximately 10 students.Then the second largest participation of boys is in cycling arround 30 students have played. moreover the participation of boys is approximately same in tennis, Football and Swimming.

Word Count: 157

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

girls: 6

participation: 5

sports: 4

cycling: 4

football: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report attempts to address the task by comparing sport preferences between boys and girls, but it contains several inaccuracies and inconsistencies that detract from its effectiveness. Key data points are misreported (e.g., stating girls have the highest participation in football, when the data shows boys at 40 and girls at 20; and claiming boys have the highest participation in swimming, when the data shows girls at 20 and boys at 10). The overall trend is also incorrectly summarized, as girls do not outnumber boys in all sports except swimming; in fact, boys outnumber girls in football. The report would benefit from a clearer and more accurate overview, correct data reporting, and a more logical structure. Additionally, there are spelling and grammatical errors (e.g., 'accross', 'arround', 'swmming', 'over all') that should be revised for clarity.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report attempts to organize information into paragraphs, but the flow is often disrupted by unclear references and abrupt transitions. The overall message is difficult to follow due to inconsistent comparisons and a lack of clear signposting. To improve, use clear topic sentences for each paragraph, ensure each paragraph has a distinct focus (e.g., one for girls, one for boys), and employ cohesive devices (e.g., 'in contrast', 'similarly', 'whereas') more accurately to guide the reader. Also, avoid repeating the same information in different paragraphs.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary is limited and repetitive, with some inappropriate word choices (e.g., 'claim to have', 'outsmart', 'overwhelmed', 'topmost involvement'). There is an attempt to use comparative language, but it is often inaccurate or awkward. To improve, use a wider range of precise vocabulary related to data description (e.g., 'participation rates', 'significantly higher', 'slightly lower', 'comparable numbers'), and ensure word choices are natural and appropriate for the context. Avoid informal or colloquial expressions.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains numerous grammatical errors and punctuation issues that significantly impede understanding. There are problems with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'contribution of girls are'), incorrect verb forms (e.g., 'have claim', 'is swmming'), and missing or misused articles. Sentence structures are often incomplete or run-on. To improve, focus on writing clear, simple sentences with correct grammar, and then gradually incorporate more complex structures. Proofread carefully to correct spelling errors (e.g., 'accross', 'arround', 'swmming') and punctuation (e.g., missing commas, incorrect capitalization).

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