Bar Chart

Band 6+: The graphs below give information concerning smartphone ownership as a percentage of population in a country from 2000 to 2010, and by level of education for the years 2000 and 2010.

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Image for topic: The graphs below give information concerning smartphone ownership as a percentage of population in a country from 2000 to 2010, and by level of education for the years 2000 and 2010.

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The image contains two bar graphs related to smartphone ownership; the first graph shows ownership from 2000 to 2010 with percentages as follows: 2000 (20%), 2002 (30%), 2004 (40%), 2006 (60%), 2008 (70%), 2010 (80%); the second graph compares ownership percentages in 2000 and 2010 by education level with percentages for 2000: No High School Certificate (10%), High School Graduate (20%), Bachelor's Degree (30%), Master's degree (40%), Doctorate degree (40%) and for 2010: No High School Certificate (50%), High School Graduate (60%), Bachelor's Degree (70%), Master's degree (80%), Doctorate degree (90%).

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The two bar charts illustrate the percentage of smartphone ownership population in a specific country between 2000 and 2010, while the second bar chart outlines the comparison of smartphone ownership by considering educational qualifications during the same period.

Overall, according to first bar graph, the smart phone users increased throughout the given period, while the highest mobile phone users indicated in the last year. By considering educational qualifications second bar chart, doctorate degree holders were the highest smartphone users in both years.

For the first chart, the least number of mobile phone users reported in 2000 at around 40%. This figure witnessed a gradual incline and reached its maximum percentage in 2010 with around 75%.

According to the smart phone ownership by educational level, the maximum number of people with doctorate degree used mobile phones in 2000 and 2010, with almost 75% and 90%, respectively. About 15% and 45% individuals without high school certificates owned a smartphone in 2000 and 2010, respectively. However, this increased to about 30% in 2000 and 60% in 2010 among high school graduates. The percentage of owners of smartphones, among highly educated people rose steadily.

Word Count: 190

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Overall Band Score

6.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

smartphone: 4

phone: 4

users: 4

percentage: 3

ownership: 3

chart: 3

educational: 3

mobile: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report addresses the task, providing a general overview of the data and highlighting key trends. However, there are some inaccuracies in the data reported, and the description could be more detailed and precise. To improve, focus on accurately representing the data and providing more specific comparisons and details.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report demonstrates an adequate arrangement of information, generally presenting a clear overview and highlighting key trends. However, the flow between some sentences and ideas could be smoother. For instance, the transition between the overall trends and the detailed descriptions of each chart could be more seamless. Consider using more varied cohesive devices to enhance the connection between sentences and paragraphs. Paragraphing is generally acceptable, but could be improved by ensuring each paragraph focuses on a single, clear aspect of the data.

Lexical Resource

The report uses a sufficient range of vocabulary to describe the data, but there's room for improvement in terms of precision and sophistication. While words like 'increased,' 'gradual incline,' and 'maximum percentage' are appropriate, incorporating more specific and varied vocabulary could elevate the description. For example, instead of 'gradual incline,' consider using 'steady growth' or 'progressive increase.' Aim to use more precise language to convey the nuances of the data and avoid repetition of simple words.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report demonstrates a reasonable command of grammar, but there are noticeable errors that affect clarity. Sentence structures are generally simple, and while accurate in many instances, there's a lack of complexity. Errors such as incorrect preposition use, subject-verb agreement issues, and awkward phrasing are present. To improve, focus on using a wider range of sentence structures and carefully proofread for grammatical errors. Pay attention to verb tenses, article usage, and correct word order to enhance the overall accuracy and fluency of the writing.

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