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Band 6+: The line graph compares the percentage of people in Africa from 1994 to 2004.

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The image shows a line graph of telephone subscribers per 100 inhabitants in Africa from 1994 to 2004; in 1994, fixed was 0.06 and mobile was 0; in 1995, fixed was 0.13 and mobile was 0; in 1996, fixed was 0.34 and mobile was 0; in 1997, fixed was 0.42 and mobile was 0.12; in 1998, fixed was 0.51 and mobile was 0.21; in 1999, fixed was 0.60 and mobile was 0.33; in 2000, fixed was 1.10 and mobile was 0.72; in 2001, fixed was 1.42 and mobile was 1.52; in 2002, fixed was 1.74 and mobile was 2.71; in 2003, fixed was 2.19 and mobile was 5.52; in 2004, fixed was 3.1 and mobile was 8.8.

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The line graph illustrates the proportion of citizens in Africa that subscribed two different types of telephone in the year 1994 to 2004.

Overall, while fixed telephone had more users in the beginning, the number of mobile subscribers surpassed fixed telephone significantly.

In 1994, only 0.06 of Africant had mobile telephones. That stayed the same for the next three years where it only showed a slight increase. However, in 1998 mobile telephone users rose significantly and proceded to overlap fixed in 2001 reaching 3 million people. In the last 3 years, mobile finished with 8.8 million subcribers reaching it’s peak in the given time period.

On the other hand, fixed telephone lead in the beginning starting with 1.7 million subscribers. Until 1998 the line continued to hover around slightly increasing. In 1999, fixed telephone experienced a slight decrease then continued to rise slowly. Fixed telephone ended the time period with only 3.1 million subscribers in Africa.

Word Count: 156

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

telephone: 7

fixed: 6

mobile: 4

million: 4

subscribers: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report adequately addresses the task by summarizing the information presented in the line graph. The overall trends are identified, and there is a clear attempt to describe the changes over time for both fixed and mobile telephone subscriptions. However, there are some inaccuracies in the data reported (e.g., '1.7 million subscribers' in the last paragraph) and some omissions of key data points. To improve, ensure that the data cited is accurate and that you include enough specific data to support your overview without overwhelming the reader.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report is generally understandable, but the flow could be improved. The organization into paragraphs is acceptable, but the transitions between sentences and ideas could be smoother. Consider using a wider range of cohesive devices to link ideas more effectively. For example, using transition words like 'similarly,' 'in contrast,' or 'furthermore' can enhance the logical flow.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, but there's room for improvement in terms of variety and precision. Some phrases are a bit repetitive or could be expressed more concisely. For instance, instead of saying 'the number of mobile subscribers surpassed fixed telephone significantly,' you could use a more sophisticated phrase like 'mobile subscriptions overtook fixed lines considerably.' Try to incorporate a wider range of synonyms and more precise vocabulary to describe trends and data.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains several grammatical errors that affect clarity. There are issues with verb tense consistency, subject-verb agreement, and article usage. For example, 'only 0.06 of Africant had mobile telephones' contains errors in both article usage and noun form. Also, 'proceded' is misspelled and 'reaching 3 million people' is inaccurate based on the data. Review basic grammar rules and proofread carefully to minimize these errors. Pay attention to sentence structure and ensure that each sentence is grammatically correct and conveys the intended meaning clearly.

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Band 6+: The line graph compares the percentage of people in Africa from 1994 to 2004.

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Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

Answers On The Same Topic:

The line graph compares the percentage of people in Africa from 1994 to 2004.

The line graph compares the percentage of people in Africa from 1994 to 2004.

The line graph compares the percentage of people in Africa from 1994 to 2004.

The line graph compares the percentage of people in Africa from 1994 to 2004.

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