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Band 6+: the mix chart depicts the average salary of different sector in 2004 and the percentage of employment sectors of graduates

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The image details: Average salary 2004 by sector - Finance: 83,000 (2.9%), Public services: 92,000 (3.7%), Transportation: 81,000 (4.5%), Manufacturing: 42,000 (4.7%), Agriculture: 40,000 (2.31%), Wholesale and retail trade: 77,000 (8.41%); Rate of employment sectors of graduates - Public services: 30%, Manufacturing: 20%, Agriculture: 25%, Finance: 5%, Wholesale and retail trade: 10%, Transportation: 10%.

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The pie chart illustrates the persentage of graduates in employement sector, while the table depicts the average salary of it in the year 2004.

Overall, it is evident that public sector and manufacturing together contribute to about 50% of the market share. With the majority of 30% of the public sector. In addition, public sector and finances constitute of the highest salary amongst all, which is about 175,000 in total. Finance being the lesser at 83,000. While when compared to the year 2003 transportation and manufacturing sector faced a drastic increase of appoximatly 4% individually.

Nevertheless, Finances hold the lowest rate of graduates that is arround 5% but the average salary is much higher then other sectors. In contrast, agricultural sector holds a significant amount of graduates, likely 25%. However, the average salary is lowest, which is about 40,000 and only 2.31% compared to the year 2003. Transportation and wholesale-retail sector together equally contributes 20% of the overall share. While the average wages of transportation sector being higher and the difference of 25,000 can be notted

Word Count: 176

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

sector: 8

average: 4

salary: 4

graduates: 3

while: 3

public: 3

about: 3

transportation: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report addresses the main features of the visual data, such as the highest and lowest salaries and employment rates, and includes an overall statement. However, there are some inaccuracies and irrelevant information (e.g., comparisons to 2003 not shown in the data), and the data is not always clearly presented. To improve, focus on accurately summarizing the key trends and comparisons without introducing unsupported information, and ensure all data points are correctly reported.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report has a logical structure with an introduction, an overview, and body paragraphs, but the flow is sometimes disrupted by unclear references and abrupt transitions. For example, the phrase 'With the majority of 30% of the public sector' is awkward, and the shift to comparing with 2003 is not clearly introduced. To improve, use clear topic sentences for each paragraph and ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single main idea. Additionally, use cohesive devices such as 'in contrast', 'similarly', and 'furthermore' more effectively to guide the reader.

Lexical Resource

The report uses some appropriate vocabulary (e.g., 'illustrates', 'depicts', 'contribute', 'drastic increase'), but there are several spelling errors and imprecise word choices that detract from clarity. For instance, 'persentage' should be 'percentage', 'employement' should be 'employment', 'appoximatly' should be 'approximately', 'arround' should be 'around', 'notted' should be 'noted', and 'then' should be 'than'. To improve, proofread carefully and use more precise terms such as 'account for', 'represent', and 'substantial proportion'. Also, avoid informal phrases like 'likely 25%' and use 'approximately' or 'about' instead.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report demonstrates some variety in sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors and awkward phrasings that affect accuracy. Examples include 'the persentage of graduates in employement sector' (missing article), 'public sector and finances constitute of the highest salary' (incorrect verb form and preposition), and 'the difference of 25,000 can be notted' (incorrect word choice and passive voice). To improve, review subject-verb agreement, use correct prepositions, and ensure that verb tenses are consistent. Also, avoid run-on sentences and use punctuation effectively to separate ideas.

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Band 6+: the mix chart depicts the average salary of different sector in 2004 and the percentage of employment sectors of graduates

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Task Response

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Lexical Resource

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Answers On The Same Topic:

the mix chart depicts the average salary of different sector in 2004 and the percentage of employment sectors of graduates

the mix chart depicts the average salary of different sector in 2004 and the percentage of employment sectors of graduates

the mix chart depicts the average salary of different sector in 2004 and the percentage of employment sectors of graduates

the mix chart depicts the average salary of different sector in 2004 and the percentage of employment sectors of graduates

Other Topics:

Task 1: The charts below show the percentage of food and goods bought from supermarkets in European countries in 1998 and 2008. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The charts below show psychologists' employment after graduating. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The bar chart shows the proportion of men and women aged 60-64 employed in four different countries in 1990 and 2000.

The bar chart shows the proportion of men and women aged 60-64 employed in four different countries in 1990 and 2000.

The pie chart below show the percentage of volunteers by organizations in the years 2008 and 2014.

Check Your Answer On This Topic?

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Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

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