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Band 6+: The pie chart below show the percentage of volunteers by organizations in the years 2008 and 2014.

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Image for topic: The pie chart below show the percentage of volunteers by organizations in the years 2008 and 2014.

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The image displays two pie charts on the percentage of volunteers by organisations for 2008 and 2014. In 2008, the percentages were: Environmental 21%, Art 18%, Sport 15%, Health Care 7%, Educational 24%, and Others 15%. In 2014, the distribution was: Environmental 29%, Art 12%, Sport 25%, Health Care 8%, Educational 17%, and Others 9%.

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The two pie charts illustrate the proportion of different organisations’ volunteers in two years (2008 and 2014).

Overall, educational organisations accounted for the largest proportion, whereas environmental organisations were the most common category at the end.

Starting from 2008, the educational and environmental categories accounted for almost a fifth. However, sport and others, constituting 15%, made up the same percentages. While healthcare represented 7%, art was twice as much as those.

Turning to 2014, environmental and sport organisations were responsible for 28% and 25%, respectively. Educational organisations showed 17%, followed by art at 12%. The least common shares were healthcare and others, represented just over a tenth (8% and 9%).

Word Count: 110

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Overall Band Score

6.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C2 - Complex
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Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

organisations: 4

educational: 3

environmental: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report appropriately addresses the task by describing the main trends and comparing the two years. The overall structure is clear, with an introduction, an overview, and detailed paragraphs. However, there are some inaccuracies in the data (e.g., environmental at 28% instead of 29%, and the statement that educational and environmental accounted for almost a fifth in 2008, which is not accurate for educational at 24%). Additionally, the phrase 'represented just over a tenth' for 8% and 9% is incorrect. To improve, ensure all data is accurately reported and avoid vague or misleading descriptions. The report could also benefit from more precise language when comparing proportions. The report falls short of the required 150 words.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report is well-organized and easy to follow, with a clear overall statement and a logical progression from 2008 to 2014. The use of cohesive devices is generally effective, though a few transitions could be smoother. For example, 'Starting from 2008' and 'Turning to 2014' are clear, but the connection between the two paragraphs could be enhanced with a more explicit linking phrase. Overall, the message is coherent and the paragraphing is appropriate.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary is appropriate and varied, with good use of synonyms such as 'accounted for', 'constituted', 'represented', and 'made up'. The report demonstrates a good range of lexical items, though there is room for more sophisticated phrasing. For instance, 'the most common category' could be replaced with 'the dominant category' or 'the leading category'. Overall, the lexical resource is strong and effectively conveys the data.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The grammar is accurate and the report uses a good range of sentence structures, including complex sentences and comparative forms. There are no significant errors, and punctuation is used correctly. To achieve a higher score, the report could incorporate more varied structures, such as passive constructions or more complex clauses. Overall, the grammatical range and accuracy are very good.

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