Pie Chart

Band 5+: The pie charts below show the percentage of people living in four types of accommodation in 1980 and 2020. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.

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Image for topic: The pie charts below show the percentage of people living in four types of accommodation in 1980 and 2020. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.

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The image displays two pie charts titled "Percentage of people in 4 types of accommodation" for the years 1980 and 2020. In 1980, the percentages for accommodation types were: 1-2 bedroom house at 20%, 1-2 bedroom flat at 15%, 3-4 bedroom house at 37%, and 3-4 bedroom flat at 28%. In 2020, the corresponding percentages were: 1-2 bedroom house at 18%, 1-2 bedroom flat at 44%, 3-4 bedroom house at 25%, and 3-4 bedroom flat at 13%.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The two pie charts illustrate the proportions of people categorise in to four types of accomodation in 1980 and 2020.

Overall,3-4 bedroom house and 1-2 bedroom flat dominated in both years by taking more than half of the percentage.While 1-2 bedroom falt significantly increased in 2020 rather than 2020 overtaking the value of 3-4 bedroom in 1980.However 3-4 bedroom flat declined sharply over the time period more than half.

In terms of early 80’s the 3-4 bedroom house recorded highest percentage of 37% which was relatively doubled the amount of 1-2 bedroom flat at just 15% followed 3-4 bedroom flat at 28%.Furthermore 1-2 bedroom house reported at 20% which was 5% more than 1-2 bedroom flat.

Regarding the mordern day the data had changed considerably over the time frame,while 1-2 bedroom flat increased dramatically up to 44% and 3-4 bedroom flat notably declined around 25% in 2020.There was a huge marginaly gap between 3-4 bedroom flat in 1980 and 2020 which was 28% in 1980 and 13% in 2020 which reduced half of the amount along with the time.In addition to that 1-2 bedroom house also dropped to 18% from 20% in the modern society.

Word Count: 195

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
A2 - Upper Beginner
Consider using more varied and advanced words.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

bedroom: 14

house: 4

which: 4

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report addresses the main requirements of the task and identifies key trends, such as the significant increase in 1-2 bedroom flats and the decline in 3-4 bedroom flats. However, there are some inaccuracies in how the data is presented and compared. For instance, the overview claims that 3-4 bedroom houses and 1-2 bedroom flats dominated both years by taking more than half the percentage, but in 1980, no single category or pair of categories clearly meets this description in a way that supports the 'dominance' claim effectively. Additionally, some comparisons are slightly confusingly worded (e.g., 'increased in 2020 rather than 2020'). To improve, focus on ensuring that mathematical comparisons (like 'doubled' or 'half') are precise and that the relationship between the categories is described with clearer logical connections.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report follows a logical structure with an introduction, overview, and body paragraphs. However, the cohesion is significantly hindered by improper use of transition words and punctuation. For example, sentences often start with 'While' or 'However' in ways that create fragments rather than complete thoughts. There are also spacing issues after commas and periods (e.g., 'Overall,3-4') which disrupt the flow. To improve, ensure that every sentence is a complete grammatical unit and use cohesive devices to link ideas smoothly rather than just starting sentences with contrastive conjunctions.

Lexical Resource

The candidate attempts to use a variety of vocabulary to describe changes (e.g., 'dominated', 'significantly increased', 'declined sharply'), which is good. However, there are several spelling errors ('accomodation', 'falt', 'mordern', 'marginaly') and awkward phrasing ('taking more than half of the percentage', 'reduced half of the amount along with the time'). To reach a higher band, focus on the accuracy of spelling and the natural collocation of words. Instead of 'taking more than half of the percentage', use 'accounting for more than half of the total'. Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

Grammatical errors are frequent and sometimes impede communication. There are issues with verb forms ('people categorise in to'), tense consistency, and sentence structure. For instance, 'which was relatively doubled the amount' is grammatically incorrect. There is also a lack of control over complex structures, leading to run-on sentences or fragments. I recommend practicing sentence combining techniques and reviewing subject-verb agreement and the correct use of relative clauses to ensure clarity.

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