Pie Chart

Band 5+: the pie charts compare people travel to a university for work or study by different vehicles

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The image contains two pie charts detailing methods of transportation for people travelling to one university for work or study in the UK for 2004 and 2009. In 2004, the methods were Car at 51%, Bus at 33%, Bicycle at 9%, Walking at 4%, and Train at 3%. In 2009, the methods were Bus at 46%, Car at 28%, Bicycle at 16%, Walking at 6%, and Train at 4%.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The pie chart that presents data comparing students and workers travelling to university for work or study by diffrent types of transport in the years 2004 and 2009.

Overall,while the percentage of who got to university by busand bicycle is increased,those of remainig ones expirienced decline.In addition,the train and walking section was always the lowest in two years surveyed.

In 2004,51% of people travelling to the university by car,which accounted for the largest portion of the chart.The proportion of car section is 17 times larger than train ones being 51% and 3%.The second largest category accounted for 33% is bus travellers,followed by 9% and 4%.

After 5 years,the figure for the bus grew significantly to 46%,ranking first the chart.Similarly,the sports data increased one fourth,while train and walking sectors experienced negligibli rise to 4% and 6%.By contrast,the car segment decreased dramatically.

Word Count: 140

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Overall Band Score

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Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
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Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

university: 3

train: 3

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Task Response

The report adequately addresses the task by summarizing the information presented in the pie charts. The overview is acceptable, and the main features are generally covered with relevant data. However, there are some inaccuracies and a few areas where the description could be more precise. To improve, ensure data accuracy and vary sentence structures for a more sophisticated presentation. Also, pay attention to grammatical accuracy and word choice to enhance clarity. The report falls short of the required 150 words.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report demonstrates an attempt to organize information, but the flow is disrupted by grammatical errors and unclear phrasing. Paragraphing is present but could be used more effectively to group related ideas. To improve coherence, ensure each paragraph focuses on a single aspect of the data and uses clear transitions between sentences and paragraphs. For example, the overview could be more concise and directly address the main trends.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is somewhat limited and contains inaccuracies ('diffrent', 'expirienced', 'remainig', 'negligibli'). There is an attempt to use comparative language, but it is not always accurate or effective ('17 times larger'). To enhance lexical resource, focus on using a wider range of vocabulary related to comparisons and trends, and ensure accuracy in spelling and word choice.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains numerous grammatical errors, including incorrect verb tenses ('is increased', 'expirienced decline'), subject-verb agreement issues, and incorrect article usage. Sentence structure is often awkward and unclear. To improve grammatical accuracy, focus on proofreading carefully for errors in verb tense, subject-verb agreement, and article usage. Practice constructing more complex sentences while ensuring grammatical correctness.

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