Table

Band 5+: The table below gives information about the percentage of workforce employed in six industries in Australia between 1989 and 2009. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

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Image for topic: The table below gives information about the percentage of workforce employed in six industries in Australia between 1989 and 2009. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

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The image displays a table comparing the percentage of workforce employed in six industries in Australia between 1989 and 2009. Manufacturing: 1989 - 15%, 2009 - 8.8%; Retail: 1989 - 11.8%, 2009 - 10.9%; Health care: 1989 - 9.6%, 2009 - 11.3%; Construction: 1989 - 6.7%, 2009 - 8.3%; Education: 1989 - 6.8%, 2009 - 7.5%; Tourism: 1989 - 5.5%, 2009 - 7.3%.

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The table illustrates how the six different employment areas are divided into percentages over a two-decade period, starting from 1989, in Australia.

Overall, the peak of worforce implied was noticed in the initial year at the manufacturing area, meanwhile in 2009, the highest proportion shifted to a health care aspect.

Regarding the former indicators, three-twentieth of population was employed at manufacturing industry, while a mere of 5.5% chose tourism as a workplace, which is the lowest number. Furthermore, both self-care and retail positioned considerably higher level, accounting for almost one-tenth and 11.8% employee respectively. Yet the lower numbers comprise 7.6 and 6.8 percents for construction and education spheres relatively.

Shifting to the latter numbers, those who chose factory-related works are now almost equvalent to previous medical care stuff, however second category catch up with former retail area’s amount of people, while retail itself slightly decreased to just over 10% in 2009. The new percentage ocurred with construction works, showing a little above 8%, and the rest two sectors climbed to around 7% for each.

Word Count: 174

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Overall Band Score

5.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C2 - Complex
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Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

retail: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report attempts to address the task by describing the table and making some comparisons. However, there are several inaccuracies and unclear expressions that detract from the overall clarity. For example, 'three-twentieth of population' is an awkward way to express 15%, and 'self-care' seems to be a misrepresentation of 'health care'. The report also contains some irrelevant or confusing phrases, such as 'the peak of worforce implied' and 'almost equvalent to previous medical care stuff'. To improve, focus on using precise language, accurately reporting the data, and structuring the response with clear overview and specific details. Avoid informal or vague terms and ensure correct spelling and grammar.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report has a clear overall structure with an introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs. However, the flow of information is sometimes disrupted by awkward phrasing and unclear references (e.g., 'the peak of worforce implied was noticed', 'both self-care and retail positioned considerably higher level'). The use of cohesive devices is present but not always effective, and some sentences are difficult to follow. To improve, focus on using clearer topic sentences and ensuring that each paragraph has a logical progression of ideas. Avoid vague terms like 'the former indicators' and 'the latter numbers' without clear antecedents.

Lexical Resource

The report attempts to use a range of vocabulary, but there are several inaccuracies and inappropriate word choices that affect clarity (e.g., 'worforce implied', 'self-care' instead of 'health care', 'equvalent', 'catch up with', 'ocurred'). Some phrases are not natural or precise (e.g., 'three-twentieth of population', 'a mere of 5.5%'). To improve, focus on using accurate and appropriate vocabulary for describing data, such as 'accounted for', 'represented', 'rose to', 'declined to'. Avoid informal or incorrect expressions and ensure that terms match the data categories (e.g., 'health care' not 'self-care').

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains a number of grammatical errors and punctuation issues that impact readability (e.g., 'worforce' for 'workforce', 'equvalent' for 'equivalent', 'ocurred' for 'occurred', missing articles, incorrect verb forms). Sentence structures are often awkward or incomplete (e.g., 'the peak of worforce implied was noticed', 'the rest two sectors climbed to around 7% for each'). To improve, work on subject-verb agreement, correct use of articles, and proper spelling. Varying sentence structures and using more complex grammatical forms accurately would also enhance the report.

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Band 5+: The table below gives information about the percentage of workforce employed in six industries in Australia between 1989 and 2009. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

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Answers On The Same Topic:

The table below gives information about the percentage of workforce employed in six industries in Australia between 1989 and 2009. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The table below gives information about the percentage of workforce employed in six industries in Australia between 1989 and 2009. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

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SUmmarise the information by selecting and reporting some main features, and make comparisons where relevaant

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