Table

Band 5+: The table below shows the proportion of the workforce who are women and the proportion of managers who are women in five different countries. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

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Image for topic: The table below shows the proportion of the workforce who are women and the proportion of managers who are women in five different countries. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

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The image displays a table with two columns showing the percentage of women in the workforce and as managers for five countries. In Australia, women constitute 42% of the workforce and 43% of managers. In Egypt, women make up 20% of the workforce and 12% of managers. In Sri Lanka, women are 41% of the workforce and 9% of managers. In Japan, women account for 48% of the workforce and 11% of managers. In the United States, women represent 46% of the workforce and 43% of managers.

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The given table provides information about the percentage of the women who work as a jobber and the proportion of women working as a manager in five variety of countries, including Australia, Egypt, Sri Lanka, Japan, and United States.

Overall, it is evident that Japan and United States attracted a lot of women working as worker, respectively, while United state and Australia showed the same figure of managers who are female, which is the highest figure in that.

Compared with 9% of women working as manager in Sri Lanka, 43% of female manager worked in Australia and United States similarly. In contrast, the figure was 12% for Egypt, while in Japan, the proportion of female managers was 17%.

By contrast, the percentage of female worker in Australia was at 42% compared to Egypt, which accounted for the lowest figure at only 20%. Compared with 41% of female worker in Sri Lanka, Japan and United State made up 48% and 46% respectively.

Word Count: 161

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Overall Band Score

5.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C2 - Complex
Continue to challenge and refine your language choices.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

united: 5

female: 5

women: 4

australia: 4

japan: 4

figure: 4

working: 3

manager: 3

egypt: 3

lanka: 3

worker: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report adequately addresses the task by presenting the main features and making comparisons. However, there are some inaccuracies (e.g., Japan's manager percentage is stated as 17% instead of 11%) and minor omissions (e.g., not explicitly stating the highest workforce percentage). The structure is clear, but the language could be more precise and formal. Ensure data accuracy and avoid informal terms like 'jobber'.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report has a clear overall structure with an introduction and two body paragraphs, but the flow is sometimes disrupted by awkward phrasing and unclear referencing. For example, 'while United state and Australia showed the same figure of managers who are female, which is the highest figure in that' is confusing. The use of cohesive devices is limited and sometimes inaccurate. To improve, use clearer topic sentences and ensure each paragraph has a central idea. Also, use a range of linking words and referencing to improve the logical flow.

Lexical Resource

The report uses some appropriate vocabulary related to the task (e.g., 'proportion', 'workforce', 'managers'), but there are several inaccuracies and awkward choices. For instance, 'jobber' is incorrect; 'worker' is used repeatedly, and 'variety of countries' is not natural. Also, 'attracted a lot of women working as worker' is not precise. To improve, use a wider range of synonyms (e.g., 'percentage', 'share', 'employed women', 'managerial positions') and ensure word choices are accurate and natural. Avoid repetition and use more sophisticated vocabulary where appropriate. Pay attention to vocabulary repetition to improve the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains several grammatical errors and punctuation issues that affect clarity. For example, 'the percentage of the women who work as a jobber' is incorrect; 'the proportion of women working as a manager' is better. There are also subject-verb agreement issues (e.g., 'United state and Australia showed') and incorrect use of articles. The sentence 'Compared with 9% of women working as manager in Sri Lanka, 43% of female manager worked in Australia and United States similarly' is awkward and has errors. To improve, focus on sentence structure, subject-verb agreement, and correct use of articles. Also, ensure that comparisons are clearly expressed and grammatically correct.

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