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Band 5+: The three pie charts show different accommodation choices by holidaymakers in the three years 1965, 1985 and 2005. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and making relevant comparisons.

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Image for topic: The three pie charts show different accommodation choices by holidaymakers in the three years 1965, 1985 and 2005. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and making relevant comparisons.

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The image contains three pie charts displaying accommodation choices by holidaymakers for the years 1965, 1985, and 2005. For 1965: hotel 55%, staying with friends/relatives 16%, camping 15%, caravans 14%. For 1985: hotel 53%, camping 18%, staying with friends/relatives 15%, caravans 10%. For 2005: hotel 38%, staying with friends/relatives 30%, camping 22%, caravans 12%.

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The preference of tourists related to distinct living places has been depicted by pie chart in three years. The data has been calibrated in percentage.

Overall, it is noticeable that highest proportion of travellers stayed at their friends and relatives house. Whereas, it was lowest in terms of camping during the period.

According to the details, in 1965, 55% of tourists preferred to remain at their friends residence .On the contrary, the ratio dropped at 35 and 30 in 1985 and 2005 respectively. Surprisingly, hotels witnessed huge percentage of holidaymakers and increased from 16 to 38 in 2005.

Turning to the further details, passion for residing in camps rose by 3% in 20 years to 18%. Although the caravans were not utilized enough till 1985, it gained importance as the year passed as 20% of holidaymakers remain in them in 2005.

Word Count: 141

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B1 - Intermediate
Using more sophisticated words could be beneficial.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:
No noticeable repetition! Great job!

Task Response

The report generally addresses the task, but there are some inaccuracies and misinterpretations of the data. The overview is not entirely accurate, and some of the details in the body paragraphs are also incorrect. For example, the report states that the highest proportion of travelers stayed at their friends' and relatives' houses, which is not true. Also, the report mentions an increase in hotel stays from 16 to 38 in 2005, but the initial figure is incorrect. The report also states that caravans gained importance, with 20% of holidaymakers staying in them in 2005, but the actual figure is 12%. To improve, ensure that you accurately represent the data and avoid misinterpretations. Also, focus on providing a clear and accurate overview of the main trends. The report falls short of the required 150 words.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report demonstrates some organization, but the flow of information could be improved. The introduction is present, and an attempt is made to provide an overview. However, the connection between sentences and paragraphs is not always clear, leading to some choppiness. Transitions could be used more effectively to guide the reader through the data. For example, the shift from discussing hotels to camping and caravans feels abrupt. Consider using cohesive devices to link ideas and create a smoother narrative.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is relatively basic and lacks precision. There are instances of inaccurate word choice ('passion for residing in camps'). To improve, focus on using more specific and varied vocabulary related to trends, proportions, and comparisons. For example, instead of 'witnessed huge percentage,' consider 'accounted for a significant proportion.' Expanding your range of vocabulary will enhance the clarity and sophistication of your writing. Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains several grammatical errors that affect clarity. There are issues with subject-verb agreement ('highest proportion of travellers stayed'), preposition usage ('at their friends residence'), and article usage. Sentence structure is also somewhat limited, leading to a lack of complexity. To improve, focus on reviewing basic grammar rules and practicing sentence construction. Pay attention to verb tenses, prepositions, and articles. Varying sentence structure will also make your writing more engaging and sophisticated.

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