Pie Chart

Band 5+: The two charts below show the proportion of qualified graduates in a particular country. To summarize information by selecting key characteristics and compiling a report and, if necessary, make a comparison. Đề 6: The diagram shows how tea leaves are processed into five tea types.

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Image for topic: The two charts below show the proportion of qualified graduates in a particular country. To summarize information by selecting key characteristics and compiling a report and, if necessary, make a comparison. Đề 6: The diagram shows how tea leaves are processed into five tea types.

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The image contains two pie charts comparing educational qualifications for the years 1980 and 2008. For 1980: PhD Science 13%, Masters Science 29%, First degree Science 56%; PhD Arts 2%, Masters Arts 12%, First degree Arts 29%. For 2008: PhD Science 30%, Masters Science 27%, First degree Science 19%; PhD Arts 7%, Masters Arts 11%, First degree Arts 5%.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The pie charts show scholars percentage in a particular country served in two different years. Overall, it is visible that science graduates consistently dominate the population of the scholars and the number of PhD in Arts stays as minority over the time.

In 1980, the percentage of masters in science became the highest with 29%, followed by the first degree arts taking place by one quarter. Scholars of first degree science, PHD Science, and Masters Arts each have pretty close proportioned by 19 percent, 13 percent, and 12 percent, respectively.

Almost three decades later, in 2008, the data shows a slight shift of the trend on graduates proportion. The numbers of PhD folks majoring in science have doubled reaching 30%, outnumbering Masters Science by 1%. Thereafter, followed by Masteral degree graduates of Arts, First degree Science, and Under Graduates Arts degree with 12% of proportion, accumulatively. Finally, learners of Arts in PhD level only rise by 1% if compares to the later year with only 3%, putting it as the least popular category.

Word Count: 173

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Overall Band Score

5.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

science: 7

degree: 5

graduates: 4

scholars: 3

masters: 3

first: 3

percent: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report covers the requirements of the task, providing an overview and highlighting key trends in the data. However, there are some omissions and inaccuracies in the data reported. To improve, ensure all significant data points are accurately represented and consider a more structured comparison between the two years.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report demonstrates an adequate attempt to organize the information, but the flow could be improved. The organization into paragraphs is present, but the connections between sentences within paragraphs sometimes feel disjointed. Consider using transition words and phrases to link ideas more explicitly and improve the overall coherence. For example, in the second paragraph, you could add phrases like 'In contrast' or 'Similarly' to show the relationship between the different percentages. In the final paragraph, the phrase 'Thereafter, followed by' is a bit awkward and could be rephrased for better clarity.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is generally appropriate, but there are opportunities to enhance the lexical range and precision. Some phrases are a bit vague or could be expressed more accurately. For instance, 'pretty close proportioned' could be replaced with a more specific term like 'relatively similar proportions'. Also, consider using synonyms to avoid repetition, such as varying how you refer to 'graduates' or 'percentages'. Overall, aim for more precise and varied language to elevate the report.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains several grammatical errors and phrasing issues that affect clarity. For example, 'Scholars percentage' should be 'percentage of scholars,' and 'served in two different years' is not quite idiomatic. The sentence 'Scholars of first degree science, PHD Science, and Masters Arts each have pretty close proportioned by 19 percent, 13 percent, and 12 percent, respectively' is grammatically awkward and could be restructured for better clarity. Pay close attention to subject-verb agreement, correct use of articles, and sentence structure to improve grammatical accuracy.

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