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Band 6+: The two plans below show the City Library in 2004 and 2014.

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Image for topic: The two plans below show the City Library in 2004 and 2014.

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The image shows two plans: City Library 2004 featuring sections: General Collection, Fiction, Non-Fiction, Children's, Newspapers, Magazines, Main Entrance, Reading Room, Reference, Gift Store, Art Gallery, Academic Journals; and City Library 2014 featuring sections: General Collection, Fiction, Non-Fiction, Children's, Teenager’s, Magazines, Movies and Computer Games, Main Entrance, Entrance, Outdoor Performance Area, Reference, Computer and Media Room, Café, Art Gallery and Gift Store.

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The given maps compare to the developments which took place in city library from 2004 to 2014.

As can be seen from the map, city library has seen significant transformations including cafe, outdoor performance area, movies and computer games over the given period. One striking feature is that fiction, non-fiction, children’s and magazines remaind unchanged.

In 2004, there used to be gift store, which was in the south-east corner made way for a computer and media room in the next ten years. Meanwhile, academic journals located in the south-west knoked down and replaced by cafe, art gallery and gift store throughout the given period.

In contrast, in the first map there was only four general collection while in the second map there has built movies and computer games adjucent to magazines . Moreover, below the magazines there was reference room and it had noticeable imptovements including academic journals by the end.

Word Count: 151

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

there: 4

given: 3

computer: 3

magazines: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report adequately addresses the task by describing the changes to the City Library between 2004 and 2014. The description is generally clear and organized, highlighting key differences and some unchanged features. However, there are some inaccuracies and omissions. To improve, ensure all significant changes are mentioned and described accurately. Also, pay attention to grammatical accuracy and sentence structure for clearer communication.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report demonstrates an adequate attempt to organize information, but the structure could be improved for better flow. The introduction and overview are present but could be more concise and impactful. The body paragraphs show an attempt to group information, but the transitions between ideas are sometimes abrupt. Consider using more cohesive devices to link sentences and paragraphs, enhancing the overall readability and logical progression of ideas. For example, using phrases like 'Furthermore,' 'In addition to,' or 'However' can help to clarify the relationships between different points.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is generally appropriate for the task, but there's room for improvement in terms of variety and precision. While words like 'transformations' and 'significant' are used, incorporating more specific and descriptive language could enhance the report. For instance, instead of 'significant transformations,' you could describe the changes more precisely, such as 'expanded facilities' or 're-allocated spaces.' Aim to use a wider range of vocabulary to describe the changes and features of the library, demonstrating a more sophisticated command of the English language.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains several grammatical errors that affect clarity. For example, 'city library has seen significant transformations including cafe' should be revised for correct grammar. Similarly, 'remained unchanged' is misspelled as 'remained unchanged.' There are also issues with sentence structure and word choice, such as 'knoked down' and 'adjucent.' To improve, focus on proofreading carefully for errors in verb tense, subject-verb agreement, spelling, and word choice. Practicing sentence construction and reviewing basic grammar rules will also be beneficial.

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