Process Diagram

Band 5+: This diagram illustrates two distinct methods for manufacturing black tea

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The image illustrates a tea production process starting with picking fresh tea leaves, where only the bud and 2 top leaves are selected for good quality tea. The next step is withering, where air is passed through leaves on a rack, removing 60% of moisture. The process then diverges into two methods: a Traditional Method for loose tea, which involves rolling leaves flat and broken to release enzymes, and a Modern Method for tea bags, which involves cutting leaves (cut, torn, and curled) in a quick process to create smaller granular pieces. Both methods proceed to oxidation/fermentation, where rolled leaves are spread on tiles or cement, and the interaction of enzymes and air changes the leaves to a copper colour. The final stage is firing/drying in an oven or hot air dryer, which releases flavour and aroma, resulting in a total of 97% moisture being removed.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The map illustrates two different ways for manufacturing black tea with traditional and contemprorary methods. Overall, there are approximately 9 stages. The process starts from picking tea leaves and ends with fully released flavor and moisture.

Moving to more detailed analysis, everything begins when bud and 2 top leaves from fresh tea are picked. Then, leaves are lied on the surface – rack, and experience withering. Consequently, 60 percentage of moisture goes out when air passed through them. After this, tea could be processed as either loose tea or tea bags.

With traditional way leaves are rolled flat and broken, while with modern they are cut, torn and curled. From rolling enzymes are released from leaves, however from cutting small granular pieces are created. Next, leaves both methods undergo oxidation or fermentation. Following that, they are spread on the title and change their colour into cooper at the same time when enzymes face air. These pieces then goes through firing in oven or drying in got air dryers. In result, 97 percentage of moisture in total is out and flavour with aroma are released.

Word Count: 184

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

leaves: 6

released: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report addresses the main stages of the process and correctly identifies the two different pathways. However, there are several issues that prevent a higher score. First, the introductory sentence incorrectly identifies the diagram as a 'map' instead of a process diagram. Second, there are several grammatical and spelling errors (e.g., 'contemprorary', 'lied on the surface', 'title' instead of 'tile', 'cooper' instead of 'copper', 'got air dryers') which, while they do not prevent understanding, affect the overall professional quality. To improve, ensure you use the correct terminology for the type of visual provided (e.g., 'diagram' or 'flowchart'). Focus on improving grammatical accuracy, particularly in subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'pieces then goes' should be 'pieces then go') and preposition usage. Additionally, try to use more varied cohesive devices to link the stages of the process more smoothly.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report follows a logical progression, moving from the initial stage to the final stage. However, the cohesion is weakened by repetitive sentence structures and some awkward transitions. To improve, use a wider variety of cohesive devices (e.g., 'Subsequently,' 'Following this,' 'In contrast to the traditional approach') and ensure that the relationship between sentences is clear. Some transitions, like 'In result,' are slightly unnatural; 'As a result' or 'Consequently' would be better.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary is sufficient to convey the main ideas, but there are several spelling errors (e.g., 'contemprorary', 'title' instead of 'tile', 'cooper' instead of 'copper', 'got' instead of 'hot') and imprecise word choices (e.g., 'leaves are lied on the surface'). Try to use more precise academic verbs and nouns. For example, instead of 'moisture goes out,' use 'moisture is removed' or 'moisture is evaporated.' Ensure spelling is accurate to avoid distracting the reader.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

There are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Issues include subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'pieces then goes through'), incorrect preposition usage, and awkward phrasing (e.g., 'experience withering'). There is an attempt to use complex sentences, but they often contain errors. Focus on mastering basic sentence structures, particularly subject-verb agreement and the correct use of passive voice, which is essential for describing processes (e.g., 'leaves are withered' or 'moisture is removed').

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