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Letter

Band 4+: You are unhappy with a product you recently bought online. Write a letter to the customer service department of the online store. You should include details about: - what product you purchased and when - what the problem is with the product - what action you would like them to take.

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Note: Both the topic and the answer were created by one of our users.

Hi!My name is Diana and a want to complain on a product I recently purchased online in your store!

September 13 will be my sisters birthday and I wanted to do a present.I was thinking for a long time and decided to buy a big beautiful mirror in your online site .I ordered ones 7 days ago.On your site was writing my mirror is going to be delivered for 3 days .I waited but sisters present didn’t deliver.After one week waiting I have product but he is broke!Now I am standing in front of the mirror and can’t see my own reflection.My sisters birthday tomorrow I have not got a present for her ,I don’t now what will I do.I spend all of my money on this mirror and I want you to turn me my money quickly !

Thank you for attention.I am waiting!

Word Count: 145

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Overall Band Score

4.5
(+/- 0.5)
Vocabulary Complexity:
A2 - Upper Beginner
Consider using more varied and advanced words.
Grammar Mistakes: N/A
Vocabulary Repetition:
mirror: 4
sisters: 3
Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

6
The letter addresses the task by identifying the product, the problem, and the desired action. However, the tone is somewhat informal, and the organization could be improved. To enhance the response, consider using a more formal tone, structuring the letter with clear paragraphs, and providing more specific details about the damage to the mirror. Also, proofread for grammatical errors and typos. The letter falls short of the required 150 words.

Coherence & Cohesion

4
The letter's organization is somewhat unclear, and the flow of information is disrupted by grammatical errors and abrupt transitions. To improve coherence, consider structuring your letter into distinct paragraphs, each addressing a specific point (e.g., introduction and purpose, details of the purchase, the problem, and the desired action). Using cohesive devices (e.g., transition words, pronouns) can help link ideas and create a smoother reading experience.

Lexical Resource

4
The vocabulary used is basic and lacks the precision needed to convey your message effectively. To enhance your lexical resource, try to incorporate more specific and varied vocabulary related to online shopping, product defects, and customer service interactions. For example, instead of 'broke,' you could use 'damaged' or 'defective.' Also, avoid overly informal language like 'Hi!' in a formal complaint letter. Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

3
The letter contains frequent grammatical errors that impede understanding. Focus on improving your sentence structure, verb tense consistency, and correct use of articles and prepositions. For example, 'a want to complain' should be 'I want to complain,' and 'ones 7 days ago' should be 'one 7 days ago' or 'it 7 days ago'. Proofread carefully to identify and correct these errors.

Answers On The Same Topic:

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