Letter

Band 7+: You borrowed a laptop from your company to work from home, but you accidentally spilled liquid on it, and it no longer works. Write a letter to your manager apologizing for the damage. You should include details about: - how the damage occurred - the current condition of the laptop - what steps you will take to resolve the issue or replace the device.

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Dear James, I hope you’re doing well. I’m writing to apologize about a minor accident that happended while I was using your laptop.

It was on the day of my presentation and I was prepared to be called on by the moderator, while waiting I decided to get a cup of coffee. While operating the laptop I kept the cup of coffee right beside me little did I know that the cup had a hole underneath which made the coffee leak out of the cup into the laptop. Shortly after the laptop went off completely.

I’m sincerly sorry about the situation, I know you’re curently enrolled in an onlinedata analysis class which requires that you have a personal computer and with the current situation of the laptop you will have to pause the classes for a while. I’m really sorry for the inconvenience that I might cause you.

If you would permit me, I would like to purchase a new laptop for you. I wouldn’t want your dream of becoming a data analysit be ruined because of my negligence.

Let me know when you will be free for us to go to the store. I look forward to hearing from you soon.

Warm regards,

Abimbola.

Word Count: 205

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B1 - Intermediate
Using more sophisticated words could be beneficial.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

laptop: 5

while: 4

coffee: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The letter appropriately addresses all three bullet points: it explains what happened to the laptop, expresses sincere apology, and proposes a solution (buying a new laptop). The tone is polite and the content is relevant. There are minor lapses in spelling and grammar (e.g., 'happended', 'sincerly', 'curently', 'onlinedata', 'analysit'), but these do not detract significantly from the overall task achievement. To improve, ensure proofreading for minor errors and consider a more concise explanation of the incident.

Coherence & Cohesion

The letter is logically organized and easy to follow. The paragraphs are appropriately used, with a clear introduction, body, and conclusion. However, some sentences are long and could be broken down for better clarity. For example, the sentence 'While operating the laptop I kept the cup of coffee right beside me little did I know that the cup had a hole underneath which made the coffee leak out of the cup into the laptop.' is a run-on and could be split into shorter sentences. Overall, the message is coherent, but minor improvements in sentence structure would enhance flow.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is appropriate and generally accurate. There is a good range of words, such as 'negligence', 'inconvenience', and 'permit'. However, there are a few spelling errors (e.g., 'happended' should be 'happened', 'sincerly' should be 'sincerely', 'curently' should be 'currently', 'onlinedata' should be 'online data', 'analysit' should be 'analyst') and some awkward phrasing (e.g., 'I was prepared to be called on by the moderator' could be more natural). The letter would benefit from more precise and natural word choices.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The letter demonstrates a reasonable range of grammatical structures, but there are several errors that affect accuracy. For example, 'happended' is a misspelling, 'sincerly' is misspelled, 'curently' is misspelled, and 'onlinedata' should be two words. Additionally, there are issues with punctuation and sentence structure, such as missing commas and run-on sentences. The phrase 'I wouldn't want your dream of becoming a data analysit be ruined' should be 'I wouldn't want your dream of becoming a data analyst to be ruined'. With more careful proofreading and attention to grammar, the accuracy could be improved.

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