Letter

Band 7+: You have been selected for a training course on computer skills that you can not attend. Write a letter to your employer - explain how this training course would help you - why won't you be able to attend it - suggest a way to have that training again

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Dear Sir or Madam,

My name is Tahmina Akter, and I am working in the accounts department as junior accounts manager of your company. I am writing this letter to thank you for offering me a training course on computer skills, which I think would be beneficial. Unfortunately, I am unable to attend this training now due to some family commitments.

Computer training would surely enhance my efficiency in computer literacy, and I could apply that to daily tasks, which in turn would help me improve the company’s productivity.

As this training course would take an extra 2 hours after office for 2 months, that is impossible for me at this moment. Recently my grandfather has suffered from a stroke and is in bed. He needs me more than ever now. He is gradually recovering, though it may take another 4 months before he will be on his own.

I have learnt that this training is held twice in a year. Therefore, I request you please let me do it for the next session, which would possibly be held in July this year.

Your prompt response regarding this matter would be greatly appreciated.

Yours faithfully,

Tahmina Akter

Word Count: 197

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

would: 6

training: 5

which: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The letter appropriately addresses all requirements of the task, providing a clear explanation of the training course's benefits, the reason for non-attendance, and a suggestion for future training. The content is relevant and sufficiently detailed. To further enhance the response, consider adding more specific examples of how the computer skills training would directly improve the company's productivity. Also, while the reason for non-attendance is clear, elaborating slightly on the family commitments could add more weight to the request.

Coherence & Cohesion

The letter is well-organized and the message is easy to follow. The paragraphing is logical, and the flow of information is generally smooth. To further enhance coherence, consider using more varied cohesive devices to link ideas within and between paragraphs. For example, you could use transition words or phrases to signal the relationship between your reasons for needing to postpone the training and your request for future participation.

Lexical Resource

The letter demonstrates a good range of vocabulary, appropriate for the task. Words like 'beneficial,' 'enhance,' 'efficiency,' and 'productivity' are well-chosen. To further improve, try incorporating more specific or nuanced vocabulary related to computer skills or the benefits of the training. For example, instead of 'enhance my efficiency in computer literacy,' you could specify which skills would be improved and how.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The letter demonstrates a good command of grammar with only minor errors. The sentence structures are varied and generally accurate. Pay close attention to verb tense consistency and article usage. For example, in the third paragraph, ensure that the tenses accurately reflect the timeline of events. Also, review the use of 'that' versus 'which' to ensure correct usage in complex sentences.

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