Letter

Band 6+: You have seen an advertisement for a part-time course at a local college that you are interested in, but you have some questions. Write a letter to the course coordinator to ask for more information. In your letter, you should: explain why you are interested in the course; ask about the schedule, fees, and prerequisites; request information about how to apply and the deadline.

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Dear Sir John,

I am writing to express my interest in robotics courses that are provided in college. It is so exciting to me to attend in order to get deep knowledge and comprehension of robots design. Moreover, I would like to try my scientific skills because I have degree in drone designing.

Definitely, there might be some obligations for attendees. I wonder whether there are meetings at weekends because, otherwise, I cannot assimilate the whole curriculum. Are there any entry fees or requests for participants? If the course is worth more than 10 dollars a month, I will be forced to reject that offer.

At last, I hope that I can receive form that I should fill in. Where is the group enrollment opened? By the way, when is the course appointment ended? I am afraid of being postponed.

I would be sincere grateful if you could respond at your earliest convenience.

Yours sincerely,

Maxim Rudakov

Word Count: 157

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Overall Band Score

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Vocabulary Complexity:
B1 - Intermediate
Using more sophisticated words could be beneficial.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

there: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The letter addresses all three bullet points: it explains interest in the course, asks about schedule, fees, and prerequisites, and requests application information and deadline. However, there are some lapses in clarity and formality. For example, 'robotics courses' is vague; specify the exact course. The phrase 'I would like to try my scientific skills' is awkward; consider 'apply my skills.' Also, 'I wonder whether there are meetings at weekends' is informal; use 'I would like to know if classes are held on weekends.' The request for fees is phrased as 'entry fees or requests for participants' which is unclear; ask directly about tuition and prerequisites. The closing 'I would be sincere grateful' should be 'I would be sincerely grateful.' Overall, the task is fulfilled, but improving clarity and formality would enhance the response.

Coherence & Cohesion

The letter is generally organized into paragraphs, but the flow is sometimes disrupted by awkward phrasing and unclear connections. For example, the transition from expressing interest to asking about obligations is abrupt. The final paragraph could be more smoothly linked to the previous content. Consider using cohesive devices such as 'Firstly', 'Additionally', and 'Finally' to guide the reader. Also, ensure each paragraph has a clear central topic.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary is adequate but not always precise or natural. Phrases like 'attend in order to get deep knowledge and comprehension' and 'assimilate the whole curriculum' are slightly awkward. Use more natural collocations such as 'gain a thorough understanding' and 'keep up with the course material'. Also, 'sincere grateful' should be 'sincerely grateful'. Expand your range of vocabulary to include more formal and academic terms appropriate for a letter to a course coordinator.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

There are several grammatical errors and awkward structures that affect clarity. For example, 'robotics courses that are provided in college' should be 'the robotics courses offered at the college'. 'I have degree in drone designing' should be 'I have a degree in drone design'. 'Are there any entry fees or requests for participants?' is unclear; consider 'Are there any tuition fees or prerequisites for participants?'. 'I would be sincere grateful' should be 'I would be sincerely grateful'. Work on subject-verb agreement, article usage, and sentence structure to improve accuracy.

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