Letter

Band 5+: You recently borrowed a valuable item from a neighbor, and it was damaged while in your care. Write a letter to your neighbor. You should include: - An apology for damaging their item. - An explanation of how the damage occurred. - A suggestion for how you plan to rectify the situation (e.g., repair, replacement).

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Hi Maria

I write this letter to tell you the bad news, onfortunately. The camera that I borrowed yesterday just got broken because it fell down when i capturing a photo while in mountain. Im so sorry for this, but if you dont mind , could i repair it to my uncle’s repair shop. I dont want to bring it back to you in this condition, and i dont have enough money to replace it to a new one. Please forgive me maria, i did not do it on coincidence. I can promise you that i will repair it as same as condition when i borrowed from you.

If you give me a chance to repair it, let me know as soon as possible, because i doubt that my uncle’ shop will be open on next few days. So it’s gonna slow down the process . So sorry once again Maria.

Sincerely,

Naufal

Word Count: 153

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
A2 - Upper Beginner
Consider using more varied and advanced words.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

repair: 4

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The letter adequately addresses all the requirements of the task, including an apology, an explanation of the damage, and a suggestion for rectifying the situation. The tone is appropriately apologetic. To improve, consider elaborating slightly more on the circumstances of the accident and providing a more concrete assurance of the repair quality or a backup plan if the repair is unsatisfactory. Also, pay attention to grammar and word choice for better clarity.

Coherence & Cohesion

The letter is generally understandable, but the organization could be improved. Consider structuring the letter with clearer topic sentences for each paragraph to enhance flow. For example, dedicate a paragraph to the apology, another to the explanation, and a final one to the proposed solution. Transition words could also be used more effectively to link ideas.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary is adequate for conveying the message, but it could be enhanced with more precise and varied word choices. For instance, instead of repeatedly saying 'repair,' you could use synonyms like 'restore' or 'fix.' Also, try to incorporate more descriptive language to explain how the damage occurred. Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

There are several grammatical errors that affect clarity. Focus on improving sentence structure, verb tense consistency, and correct use of articles and prepositions. Proofreading carefully for errors in spelling and punctuation is also recommended. For example, 'onfortunately' should be 'unfortunately,' and 'i capturing' should be 'I was capturing'.

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Band 7+

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