Letter

Band 4+: You recently moved to a new apartment, but you are not satisfied with several things in the building. Write a letter to the building manager. In your letter: • explain when you moved in • describe the problems you are facing • say what you want the manager to do

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Note: Both the topic and the answer were created by one of our users.

Dear Building manager,

Hi, my name is patrick, Recently I am relocated to new town and decided to move to your new apartment. I am writing to express my dissatisfaction with issues about the cleanness, elevator broken and water leak.

Unfortunately, The first week seem to be fine, but everytime I come back to home I alway noticed the dust alway come through in my room causing me hard to breath and inconvenience. Then during night time while I sleeping the water leak from the air condition keep droped in to my bed it wet and soak which make me insomnia and not comfortable at all. Lastly in morning, I need to commute work early and elevator has been broken leading me to working late.

I would be grateful and appreciate If you could send techinician to solve this air condition in my room and need to clean the balocony and find grill to cover window and control the amount of dust, and the elevator as well.

Thank you, and I hope It would be better.

Best regard,

Patrick

Word Count: 179

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Overall Band Score

4.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

elevator: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The letter adequately addresses the task by describing the problems, explaining their effects, and suggesting solutions. However, the language could be more precise and formal for a letter to a building manager. To improve, focus on using more specific vocabulary and maintaining a consistently formal tone throughout the letter.

Coherence & Cohesion

The letter's organization is somewhat clear, but the flow of ideas could be improved. Consider using more explicit transitions between the problems you're describing to enhance readability. For example, you could use phrases like 'In addition to this' or 'Furthermore' to connect related issues. Also, ensure each paragraph focuses on a single main point to maintain clarity.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is adequate for conveying the main points, but there's room for improvement in terms of precision and variety. For instance, instead of saying 'dust alway come through,' you could use 'dust consistently enters.' Try to incorporate more specific and descriptive words to make your letter more impactful. Also, be mindful of using the correct register for a formal letter; avoid overly casual language.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The letter contains several grammatical errors that affect clarity. Pay close attention to verb tense consistency (e.g., 'I am relocated' should be 'I relocated'), subject-verb agreement, and correct article usage (e.g., 'the cleanness' should be 'cleanliness'). Also, work on sentence structure to avoid run-on sentences and ensure each sentence conveys a clear and complete thought. Proofreading carefully before submitting can help catch these errors.

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