Letter

Band 5+: You recently went to a concert and thought one of the singers was very good. You want to tell him how you feel. Write a letter to the singer. In you letter Say how you feel about his performance Give details of your musical activities Explain how you would like him to help you with your musical activities.

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Dear Mr John

I am writing to express my experience of your outstanding performance.

I would like to explain about your song which was heart touching, that made sense in my mind, however, the body language made me feel sound perfect.

I like learn music because I am romantic music lover and I have my abilities to do it. I did not take part of any music programme before due to fear. But I need on this, that I can learn better and performed well in future. So, I think need help to improvement in this field from a expert musician like you.

In this area I think I need a learning structure and practice from a professional, furthermore, a practical mentor who assist me to care and be productive. You are with no time, but, my humble request to you give some time to me that I can enhance my productivity on music and can secure a spot as like a star.

Thank you for your consideration and valuable time.

I am looking forward to your kind response.

Your’s sincerely

MD. Zahangir Alam

Word Count: 184

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B1 - Intermediate
Using more sophisticated words could be beneficial.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

music: 4

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The letter addresses the task, but contains some irrelevant or inaccurate information. The letter includes some details about the concert and the writer's musical interests, but the explanation of how the singer can help is not entirely clear. To improve, focus on providing specific and clear requests for assistance, and ensure the language is accurate and appropriate for a formal letter.

Coherence & Cohesion

The letter's organization is somewhat unclear, and the progression of ideas could be smoother. Consider using more explicit transitions to connect your thoughts and improve the flow of your letter. For example, when transitioning from describing the performance to your own musical interests, a clearer link would help. Also, ensure each paragraph focuses on a single main idea to enhance clarity.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is basic and lacks the sophistication needed to fully express your admiration and request. Try to incorporate a wider range of descriptive words and phrases to make your letter more engaging and to better convey your feelings about the singer's performance and your aspirations in music. For instance, instead of 'heart touching,' you could use 'deeply moving' or 'profoundly affecting.'

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The letter contains several grammatical errors that impede understanding. Focus on improving sentence structure, verb tense consistency, and correct use of articles and prepositions. For example, the sentence 'I like learn music because I am romantic music lover' needs significant revision to be grammatically correct. Proofreading carefully and focusing on basic grammar rules will help improve accuracy.

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