Bar Chart

Band 5+: You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. The graph below shows the top priorities by business companies in the USA in 2016. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.

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Image for topic: You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. The graph below shows the top priorities by business companies in the USA in 2016. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.

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The image displays a bar graph with three groups of business sizes: 0 to 25 employees, 26 to 200 employees, and 201 or more employees, each group assessed across five criteria. For businesses with 0 to 25 employees, the percentages are: Converting contacts/leads to customers 71%, Increasing number of contacts/leads 43%, Increasing revenue derived from existing customers 33%, Providing ROI of marketing activities 20%, and Reducing the cost of contact/lead/customer acquisition 20%. For businesses with 26 to 200 employees, respective metrics are: 73%, 33%, 47%, 26%, and 26%. For businesses with 201 or more employees, the measurements are: 79%, 66%, 58%, 55%, and 30%.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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Note: Both the topic and the answer were created by one of our users.

The bar chart illustrates the information about main priorities of companies in the US in 2016.

Overall, all companies from 0 to 201 and more employees had a similar pattern of shares in priorities and top 2 was converting contacts to customers and increasing number of leads/ contacts.

Companies with 0 to 25 employees had 71% for both converting contacts to customers and increasing number of leads, which is very similar to 26 to 200 employes business companies with 73% and 79%, respectively. As for increasing revenue derived from existing customers and providing ROI of marketing activities 0-25 employees, companies showed 43% and 33%, respectively. 26 to 200 employes companies demonstrated I higher rate for same priorities with both 47% for increasing revenue and proving ROI. At the same time, the percentage for reducing the cost of contact acquisition was 20% for former and 26% for the latter.

For business companies with 201 and more workers the situation was slightly diffident. It showed four close figures: 66% for converting contacts into customers, 62% for increasing number of contacts, for increasing revenue derived from existing customers and providing ROI of marketing 55% and 58%, respectively. It also demonstrated the highest rate (30%) for reducing the cost of contact acquisition among all types of companies.

Word Count: 213

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

companies: 7

increasing: 6

customers: 5

contacts: 4

priorities: 3

employees: 3

converting: 3

number: 3

respectively: 3

revenue: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report addresses the task and provides an overall summary, but it contains several inaccuracies and omissions. For example, the percentages for the 0-25 employee group are incorrectly stated (e.g., 71% for both converting contacts and increasing leads, whereas the actual figures are 71% and 43%). Also, the data for the 26-200 group is partially misreported (e.g., 47% for both increasing revenue and ROI, but the actual figures are 47% and 26%). The report omits some key data points and includes some irrelevant or inaccurate information, which detracts from task achievement. To improve, ensure all data is accurately reported and focus on selecting the most significant features and making clear comparisons. Additionally, avoid vague statements like 'similar pattern' without specific support, and proofread for grammatical errors and clarity.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report has a logical structure with an introduction, an overview, and body paragraphs, but the flow is sometimes disrupted by unclear referencing and awkward phrasing. For example, 'top 2 was converting contacts to customers and increasing number of leads/ contacts' is vague, and 'for former and 26% for the latter' is confusing. The paragraphing is acceptable, but the cohesion between sentences could be improved by using clearer linking words and ensuring that pronouns and demonstratives refer clearly to the intended nouns. To improve, use more precise referencing (e.g., 'the former' and 'the latter' correctly) and ensure each paragraph focuses on a clear set of comparisons.

Lexical Resource

The report uses some appropriate vocabulary for describing data (e.g., 'illustrates', 'priorities', 'respectively', 'demonstrated'), but there are several inaccuracies and limited range. For instance, 'employes' is a spelling error, 'diffident' is a misused word (likely meant 'different'), and 'proving ROI' is a typo for 'providing ROI'. The phrase 'shares in priorities' is not idiomatic. To improve, expand your range of synonyms for 'percentage' and 'show' (e.g., 'account for', 'represent', 'indicate'), and ensure correct spelling and word choice. Also, avoid informal phrases like 'top 2' in academic writing.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report attempts to use a variety of sentence structures, but there are numerous grammatical errors that affect clarity. Examples include 'all companies from 0 to 201 and more employees had a similar pattern of shares' (incorrect preposition and phrasing), '26 to 200 employes business companies' (missing hyphen and spelling), 'I higher rate' (article error), and 'It showed four close figures' (unclear subject). Punctuation is mostly correct, but the overall accuracy is inconsistent. To improve, review subject-verb agreement, use of articles, and prepositions. Practice writing more complex sentences with accurate grammar, and proofread to eliminate typos.

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