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Letter

Band 4+: You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. You are going on a month training programme to the UK and know that the head of the course would like one of the participants to be the social events' organiser. Write a letter to the Training Organiser. In your letter • expressing your interest in the role • requesting more information about it • explaining what experience you have

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Note: Both the topic and the answer were created by one of our users.

Dear Mr. George,

Good Morning

My name is Miss. Aruha Sen, I am YouTuber in Gaming. I have seen your UK training program post on one of social media platforms to be conducted in November month. I am interested to be part of this training program as there is limited seats. I want to be one of participant. I have well experience in action games. I want to gain more knowledge on international level.

I want more depth information like duration, Which city in UK, visa sponsorship, accodmation and total cost of program. I need topics covered in program. As its international level, want trainer’s details with their profile. I have never been attended any such program, want to know any restrictions on carrying electronic devices. Workstations are available through program?

I am Youtuber under named Sky, I have 400K subscribers. I have Instagram and Facebook accounts also. I have 600K followers on Instagram. I am more famous in youth age below 25. My Thrown game is popular in the action gaming zone. I have almost posted more than 200 podcasts also.

Looking forward more information

Yours sincerely,

Arucha

Word Count: 189

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Overall Band Score

4
(+/- 0.5)
Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.
Grammar Mistakes: N/A
Vocabulary Repetition:
program: 5
Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

4
The letter attempts to address the task but has significant issues. It expresses interest in the role of social events' organiser, but this is not clearly stated and is mixed with general interest in the training program. The request for more information is extensive but includes irrelevant details (e.g., visa sponsorship, electronic devices) and omits key aspects related to the social events' organiser role. The experience provided is largely irrelevant, focusing on gaming and social media following rather than event organisation. The tone and format are informal and contain inaccuracies (e.g., 'I am YouTuber', 'I have well experience'). To improve, clearly state your interest in the organiser role, ask specific questions about the role's responsibilities and support, and provide relevant experience in organising social events, such as planning gatherings or coordinating activities.

Coherence & Cohesion

4
The letter is somewhat difficult to follow due to abrupt shifts between topics and a lack of clear paragraphing. The opening is informal and the purpose is not clearly stated. The body jumps from expressing interest to requesting information to describing experience without smooth transitions. To improve, organize the letter into clear paragraphs: one for expressing interest, one for requesting information, and one for detailing experience. Use cohesive devices such as 'Firstly', 'In addition', 'Furthermore' to link ideas. Also, ensure the tone is consistently formal and appropriate for a training organiser.

Lexical Resource

4
The vocabulary is limited and sometimes informal or inappropriate for the context (e.g., 'I am YouTuber in Gaming', 'I am more famous in youth age below 25'). There are also errors in word choice and collocation (e.g., 'well experience', 'more depth information', 'Thrown game'). To improve, use a wider range of formal vocabulary and precise terms. For example, say 'I am a gaming YouTuber' or 'I have substantial experience in action games'. Avoid informal phrases and ensure that terms like 'accommodation' and 'workstations' are used correctly. Expand your lexical range by using synonyms and more sophisticated expressions.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

3
The letter contains numerous grammatical errors that impede understanding. There are issues with articles (e.g., 'I am YouTuber' should be 'I am a YouTuber'), verb tenses (e.g., 'I have seen' is correct but 'I am interested to be part' should be 'I am interested in being part'), and sentence structure (e.g., 'I want more depth information like duration, Which city in UK, visa sponsorship, accodmation and total cost of program' is a run-on and lacks proper punctuation). There are also spelling errors (e.g., 'accodmation' should be 'accommodation', 'Youtuber' should be 'YouTuber'). To improve, focus on basic grammar rules, use a variety of sentence structures, and proofread carefully. Practice writing with correct punctuation and ensure subject-verb agreement.

Answers On The Same Topic:

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