Opinion

Band 4+: Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Businesses should advertise their products and services to succeed. Why or why not?

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Current days businessmen are usually emphasise their goods in some vibrent way from doing publicity. This are happening because of business competion and same qualityful products producing. I thing its have both side pros and cons.

There are a number of reasons why many people emphasise, One of them is business compition. For this reason business men are spend a lot of money for products advertising. As a result it helps to increase their selling. One the other hand nowadays products become similler so people are not identifying what products they are buying. For this reason when they are sawing the products adverise they get some knowledge about this products quality. As a reault it inhance the business goodwill.

Despite this advantages their have some disadvantages . One of them are waste a lots of money for publicity . For this reason businessmen get less profit from this products. Other things are they are doing a lots of pubicity: among tv programs, social media, posters and so on for the same products. As a results people became very agrey for this advertising.

In conclusion, it is true that nowadays business become more competitive for this reason businessmen are thing creative for selling their produccing products and advertising and it have some both positive and negative sides aslo.

Word Count: 217

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

products: 9

business: 5

their: 4

reason: 4

businessmen: 3

people: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The essay addresses the main parts of the prompt and presents a position. However, the ideas lack clarity and sufficient development. To improve, focus on providing more specific examples and elaborating on the reasoning behind your points. Also, ensure that your arguments are well-organized and easy to follow. The essay falls short of the required 250 words.

Coherence & Cohesion

The essay demonstrates some attempt at organization, but the flow of ideas is frequently disrupted by grammatical errors and unclear phrasing. Paragraphing is present but could be used more effectively to separate distinct ideas. Transitions between sentences and paragraphs are often weak or absent, making it difficult for the reader to follow the argument. To improve coherence and cohesion, focus on using clear topic sentences, logical transitions, and well-defined paragraphs.

Lexical Resource

The essay uses a limited range of vocabulary, and there are instances of inaccurate word choice. The language used is not always appropriate for academic writing. To improve lexical resource, focus on expanding your vocabulary and using more precise and varied language. Pay attention to collocations and the appropriate use of words in context. Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The essay contains numerous grammatical errors, including errors in verb tense, subject-verb agreement, article usage, and sentence structure. These errors significantly impede understanding. The range of grammatical structures used is limited. To improve grammatical range and accuracy, focus on mastering basic grammar rules and practicing sentence construction. Review and correct errors in your writing carefully.

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