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Band 5+: In many parts of the world, people now often throw things away when they are broken and buy new ones, whereas in the past broken things were repaired and used again. Why do you think this is the case? What problems may it lead to?

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It is true that in many parts of the world, individuals now frequently throw items when they are damaged and buy new ones, while in the past broken things were repaired and used again. I believe that in the past only affluents have an opportunity to buy new things, but nowadays, even ordinary people can afford to buy new items because of high salary. However, this can lead to some severe problems like environmental issues and overconsumption.

On the one hand, one of the main reasons why people now buy new things is getting high salary. In the past ordinary people reused and repaired broken things as they could not afford to buy new ones, but now people have stable salary which gives them an opportunity to upgrade their things. Due to this, people want to show off their abilities that they can buy new things instead of repairing them. This means that they show their wealth by buying new goods. In addition, upgraded things always work productive and efficient. For example, new gadgets like vacum cleaner or phones, it commonly purify a house or complete their works better than repaired ones. Therefore, new commodities may alleviate people’s life.

On the other hand, throwing damaged things rather than reuse it can lead to environmental problems. Things made of plastic, paper or metal can harm to the nature. Such kind of products should be disposed because they can disrupt life of habitats in the forest or ocean. For instance, in the ocean, there are plenty of water animals, so things produced out of plastic can be an obstacle to movement of fish. Moreover, overconsumption is also one of the effects of buying new things instead of repairing. People may not realize consequences of spending a large amount of money to new commodities. As a result, they can spend too much money, so a lack of money can contribute to living in poor conditions.

In conclusion, I believe that one of the main reasons why people in the past reused damaged things is that only the richest could buy new things. Also, new things can work better than repaired ones. Nevertheless, it can cause environmental problems and overconsumption among people.

Word Count: 368

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Overall Band Score

5.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

things: 14

people: 8

repaired: 4

their: 4

damaged: 3

salary: 3

problems: 3

environmental: 3

money: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The essay addresses the prompt and presents a clear position, but the development of ideas is somewhat limited and lacks precision. The reasons for the shift from repairing to buying new items are only partially explored, and the problems are mentioned but not fully elaborated. To improve, provide more specific examples and explain the causes and consequences in greater depth. Additionally, ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single main idea and supports it with clear, relevant details.

Coherence & Cohesion

The essay has a clear structure with an introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion. The main ideas are presented, but the flow is sometimes disrupted by awkward phrasing and unclear pronoun references. For example, 'it commonly purify a house or complete their works better than repaired ones' is confusing. The use of cohesive devices is basic, and some transitions between ideas could be smoother. To improve, ensure each paragraph has a clear central topic and use a range of linking words and phrases to connect ideas more logically.

Lexical Resource

The essay uses a reasonable range of vocabulary, but there are some inaccuracies and awkward choices. For instance, 'affluents' should be 'affluent people' or 'the wealthy', and 'vacum cleaner' is misspelled. The phrase 'upgraded things always work productive and efficient' is not idiomatic; it should be 'work productively and efficiently'. To improve, expand your vocabulary for common IELTS topics (e.g., 'consumerism', 'disposable culture', 'environmental degradation') and ensure word forms and collocations are correct. Pay attention to vocabulary repetition to improve the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The essay demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are several grammatical errors that affect clarity. Examples include subject-verb agreement ('things... it commonly purify'), incorrect verb forms ('can harm to the nature' should be 'can harm nature'), and article usage ('a lack of money can contribute to living in poor conditions' is acceptable but 'the nature' is incorrect). Punctuation is mostly correct, but some sentences are run-ons. To improve, review grammar rules for subject-verb agreement, articles, and prepositions, and practice writing more complex sentences with accurate grammar.

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