Opinion

Band 4+: Modern forms of communication such as email and messaging have reduced the amount of time people spend seeing their friends. This has had a negative effect on their social lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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There is no doubt that in recent years, people have often communicated through electric devices like email or messaging instead of meeting their friends directly. But it is not certain that affects their social relationships

As far as communication is concerned, modern chats such as messaging or email allow people to talk to each other, chat, or video call everywhere and anytime they want. In the past, they tried to tell a story so they needed to meet directly or send a letter that spent a lot of time. However, at the moment, people can just click on their phone, laptop, computer,.. and then they will see their acquaintances and don’t need to wait a few days to receive those letters. So their relationship will be better and more cherisher.

On the other hand, marginalized groups are able to connect with like-minded individuals through chat applications and help them feel satisfied and happy. For example: LGBTQIA + persons meet and chat with people the same as them although they live in a small village where inhabitants protest LGBT.

In conclusion, technology chats have caused people to diminish the amount of time to see their friends but their relationships can have more positive effects

Word Count: 203

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

their: 7

people: 5

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

4.5

The essay addresses the prompt by discussing the impact of modern forms of communication on social lives. However, the position is not fully developed and lacks depth. The ideas presented are somewhat relevant but could be further extended and supported with more examples or evidence. To improve, provide a clearer stance and elaborate on the effects of reduced face-to-face interactions on social relationships. The essay falls short of the required 250 words.

Coherence & Cohesion

3.5

The essay is somewhat coherent and cohesive, but there are some issues with transitions and organization. The flow of ideas could be improved by better structuring the paragraphs and linking sentences more effectively. Consider using cohesive devices to enhance the overall coherence of the essay.

Lexical Resource

3.5

There is an attempt to use a range of vocabulary, but some words are used incorrectly or inappropriately. Work on expanding your vocabulary and using words more precisely. Additionally, aim for more natural and sophisticated language to demonstrate a higher level of lexical resource.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

3.5

The essay demonstrates some variety in sentence structures, but there are noticeable grammatical errors throughout. Pay attention to subject-verb agreement, verb tense consistency, and sentence construction. Proofreading for grammar and punctuation will help improve the overall accuracy of the essay.

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