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Band 4+: nowadays many people complain that they have difficulties getting enough sleep. what problems can lack of sleep cause? whatcan be done about lack of sleep?

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Health care profrssionals suggest sleeping enough is very inmportant for both physical and mental health. Recent researches have shown that many individuals are suffering from sleeplessness. There are many reasons underlying on this problem and they should follow some lifestyle changes to get rid of this.

Many factors can affect sleep. Stress can be the major issue. People easily getting stressed because of having financial issues, relationship conflicts, some life events for example death of loved one or seperation, over work load so on. More over Psychologists say some individuals who have Depression could not sleep properly . Another big reason is our life style. Most of us spending our free time on mobile phones. These long hour screen time at nights affect our sleep significantly. For example my friend addicted to mobile video game freefire for two years. After that she suffered from insomnia which is the medical term refers chronic sleeplessness.

There are many ways to fight with stess. Fitness programs is the best way to help body to function properly. When we follow some fitness programs like yoga, sports, a walk and exercise, it helps to release dopamine (a happy hormone) so people boost their mental and physical health. A talk with friend and sharing can be reduce stress level. For the second reason, people should change their lifestyle as going bed early and regular time, avoid caffine in the evenings, changing hobbies like reading, gardening instead of using phones.

Finally, individuals should take care about their sleep pattern and make some changes in their day today actvities and learn how to safe themselfs from stress and burnout.

Word Count: 271

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Overall Band Score

4.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

sleep: 4

their: 4

health: 3

individuals: 3

should: 3

stress: 3

people: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The essay addresses the main parts of the prompt, presenting a position and relevant ideas. However, the ideas lack clarity and sufficient development. To improve, focus on providing more specific examples and explanations to support your points. Also, ensure that your writing is clear and concise, avoiding vague language and generalizations.

Coherence & Cohesion

The essay demonstrates some organization, but the progression of ideas is not always clear. Paragraphing is present, but could be improved to better separate and develop distinct points. Transitions between sentences and paragraphs are often weak or missing, making it difficult for the reader to follow the argument. Consider using more cohesive devices to link ideas and improve the flow of the essay.

Lexical Resource

The essay uses a limited range of vocabulary, with some inaccuracies and inappropriate word choices. There are instances of basic vocabulary being used where more precise or sophisticated language would be more suitable. Work on expanding your vocabulary and using a dictionary or thesaurus to find more appropriate words. Pay attention to collocations and the correct usage of words in context. Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The essay contains frequent grammatical errors, including errors in verb tense, subject-verb agreement, article usage, and sentence structure. These errors often impede understanding. Focus on improving your understanding of basic grammar rules and practice writing simple, accurate sentences before attempting more complex structures. Proofread carefully to identify and correct errors.

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