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Band 5+: Some people believe that watching TV is bad for children, while others think it has a positive influence on their development. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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Some individuals have the opinion that watching TV is a terrible experience for children, however others don’t agree with it and they have thoughts that it has a more beneficial effect for their development. In my mind as a person who grew up watching TV it has no negative effects for the younger generation instead it can affect well.

Several parents do not give permission to watch TV because from their view it can be bad for children’s health especially for their eyes. Moreover they believe that movies or animation stories could show improper conduct. Also they are scared that some characters show bad behaviour and children will copy it in school for others. It is possible when parents don’t control them, it is not related to watching TV.

Watching TV can affect good things provided that it will control what shows children will watch and also parents should control time of process. If children watch dancing, singing, or other skills, children will do it too. Or watching language lessons, children will be studying a new language just by watching. Also children will copy character traits to be kind to others. Parents just need to know what to show children and not let them sit in front of the television for too long.

In conclusion, all things connected with children must have risks even if it is simple- watching TV, but if everything is under control, watching television can be beneficial and have a positive effect on children, teaching them good things.

Word Count: 252

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

children: 10

watching: 7

parents: 4

control: 4

others: 3

their: 3

watch: 3

things: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The essay addresses the main parts of the prompt by discussing both the positive and negative views of children watching TV and providing the writer's opinion. However, the ideas presented lack clarity and could be more developed. The arguments are somewhat simplistic and could benefit from more specific examples and deeper analysis. To improve, focus on providing more concrete evidence to support your claims and ensure that your ideas are clearly articulated.

Coherence & Cohesion

The essay demonstrates some organization, but the progression of ideas is not always clear. Paragraphing is present, but the connections between sentences and paragraphs could be strengthened. Use more cohesive devices to link ideas and improve the flow of the essay. For example, transition words and phrases can help to guide the reader through your argument.

Lexical Resource

The essay uses a limited range of vocabulary, and some word choices are not entirely appropriate or accurate. There are instances of repetitive language. To improve, try to use a wider range of vocabulary and pay attention to the precise meaning of words. Consider using a thesaurus to find synonyms and expand your lexical range. Pay attention to vocabulary repetition to improve the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The essay contains numerous grammatical errors, including incorrect verb tenses, subject-verb agreement issues, and awkward sentence structures. These errors impede understanding. Focus on improving your understanding of basic grammar rules and sentence construction. Practice writing simple sentences and gradually incorporate more complex structures as your accuracy improves. Proofread carefully to identify and correct errors.

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Band 5+: Some people believe that watching TV is bad for children, while others think it has a positive influence on their development. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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Overall Band Score

Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

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Some people believe that watching TV is bad for children, while others think it has a positive influence on their development. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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