Opinion

Band 5+: Some people think that government should not spend money on sports stadium and building theatres. Instead it should spend more money on education. Do you agree or disagree

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IT IS OFTEN ARGUED THAT MANY INDIVIDUALS THINK THAT AUTHORITIES SHOULD NOT SPEND MONEY ON BUILDING THEATRES AND SPORTS STADIUMS . WHILE OTHERS SAY THAT GOVERNMENT SHOULD SPEND MORE MONEY ON MEDICAL CARE AND EDUCATION SECTORS . IN THIS ESSAY I WILL DISCUSS BOTH VIEWS AND GIVEN MY OPINION WHY I BELIEVE BOTH ARE IMPORTENT BUT MEDICAL AND EDUCATION SECTORS MORE IMPORTENT THAN SPORTS STADIUMS .

FIRSTLY , THERE ARE MANY TO SAY GOVERNMENT SHOULD NOT PUT MONEY ON BUILDING THEATRES AND SPORTS STADIUMS ONE KEY REASON IS THAT THEY THINK GOVERNMENT SHOULD SPEND MONEY ON ESSENTIAL PUBLIC SERVICES . THIS IS MAINLY BECAUSE PUBLIC SURVICE SUCH AS TRANSPORTATION , HEALTH , CREATE JOB SECTORS DIRECTLY EFFECT INDIVIDUALS LIFE AND IMPROVE QUALITY OF LIVEING . WHEN PEOPLE’S SEE PUBLIC SERVICE MORE BANEFICIAL THAN THEATER AND SPORTS STUDIUMS THEY THINK AUTHORITIES SHOULD NOT SPEND MONEY ON THESE SECTORS . FOR EXAMPLE , IN MANY CONTRIES PUBLIC SURIVICE IS NOT GOOD SO PEOPLE GIVE THEIR FIRST PRIORITY ON PUBLIC SURVICES THAN ENTERTAINMENT SECTORS .

SECONDLY , THERE ARE MANY REASONS BEHIND THE STATEMENT THAT AUTHORITIES SHOULD SPEND MORE MONEY ON MEDICAL CARE AND EDUCATION . ONE MAJOR REASON IS BATTER HEALTH CARE CAN IMPROVE PEOPLE QUALITY OF LIFE AND REDUCE THE NUMBE OF PEVENTABLE DISEASES . THIS IS MAINLY BECAUSE IF GOVERNMENT SPEND MORE MONEY ON THIS SECTOR IT CAN IMPROVE QUALITY HEALTH SURVICE AT LOW COSTS . WHEN PEOPLE GET DEMICAL SURVICE EASILY THEY CAN IMPROVE THEIR HEALTH CONDITION . MOREOVER , INVESTMENT ON EDUCATION CAN CREATE MORE SKILLED WORKFORCE AND CONTRIBUTE TO ECONOMIC . THIS IS MANILY BECAUSE , IF STUDENTS GET BATTER EDUCATION THEY CAN EASILY IMPROVE THEIR SKILLS . FOR THIS GIVEN REASONS I THINK GOVERNMENT SHOULD SPEND MONEY ON MEDICAL CARE AND EDUCATION . THAN SPORTS AND THEATRES .

IN CONCLUSION, ALTHOUGH BOTH HAVE THEIR OWN ADVANTAGES BUT SECOND ARGUMENT SUCH SPEND MONEY ON EDUCATION AND MEDICAL CARE IS MORE IMPORTENT BECAUSE IT CAN IMPROVE QUALITY OF LIFE AND CARETE SKILLED WORKFORSE . SO I AGREE WITH THIS STATEMENTS .

Word Count: 343

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C2 - Complex
Continue to challenge and refine your language choices.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

money: 9

spend: 8

should: 7

education: 7

improve: 6

sports: 5

government: 5

medical: 5

sectors: 5

public: 5

think: 4

because: 4

health: 4

quality: 4

their: 4

authorities: 3

theatres: 3

stadiums: 3

importent: 3

survice: 3

people: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The essay addresses both views and presents a clear position, which meets the basic requirements of the task. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited and lacks depth. The first paragraph on the view against theatres and stadiums is underdeveloped, with the example being vague and not fully explained. The second paragraph on medical care and education is better supported but still could be more specific. To improve, ensure each point is fully extended with concrete examples or evidence, and avoid repetition. Also, work on clarity and precision in expressing ideas, as some sentences are unclear or contain grammatical errors that affect readability.

Coherence & Cohesion

The essay has a clear structure with an introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion, which helps the reader follow the argument. However, the flow is often disrupted by abrupt transitions and repetitive phrasing. For example, the introduction and body paragraphs could be more smoothly linked, and the use of cohesive devices is limited. To improve, use a wider range of linking words and phrases (e.g., 'On the one hand', 'Furthermore', 'In contrast') and ensure each paragraph has a clear topic sentence that is developed logically. Also, avoid repeating the same ideas in different words, as this can make the essay feel less coherent.

Lexical Resource

The essay uses a range of vocabulary related to the topic, such as 'essential public services', 'skilled workforce', and 'preventable diseases', which shows some flexibility. However, there are frequent spelling errors (e.g., 'importent', 'survice', 'baneficial', 'contries', 'batter', 'demical', 'carate') and awkward word choices (e.g., 'put money on' instead of 'spend money on', 'given my opinion' instead of 'give my opinion'). These errors reduce the clarity and naturalness of the writing. To improve, focus on accurate spelling and use more precise and formal vocabulary. For instance, use 'healthcare' instead of 'medical care' and 'facilities' instead of 'sectors' where appropriate. Reading more academic texts can help expand your lexical range. Pay attention to vocabulary repetition to improve the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The essay demonstrates some variety in sentence structures, including complex sentences, but there are numerous grammatical errors that affect clarity. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues ('people's see' should be 'people see'), incorrect word forms ('liveing' should be 'living'), and missing articles ('the government' instead of 'government'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, with missing commas and incorrect capitalization. To improve, review basic grammar rules, especially for articles, prepositions, and verb tenses. Practice writing sentences with a mix of simple, compound, and complex structures, and proofread your work to catch errors. Using a grammar checker can help identify common mistakes.

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Band 5+: Some people think that government should not spend money on sports stadium and building theatres. Instead it should spend more money on education. Do you agree or disagree

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Overall Band Score

Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

Essays On The Same Topic:

Some people think that government should not spend money on sports stadium and building theatres. Instead it should spend more money on education. Do you agree or disagree

Some people think that government should not spend money on sports stadium and building theatres. Instead it should spend more money on education. Do you agree or disagree

Some people think that government should not spend money on sports stadium and building theatres. Instead it should spend more money on education. Do you agree or disagree

Some people think that government should not spend money on sports stadium and building theatres. Instead it should spend more money on education. Do you agree or disagree

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Learning foreign languages is a waste of time because digital translation tools work instantly and accurately. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some young people are leaving the countryside to live in cities and towns, leaving only old people in the countryside. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development

Check Your Own Essay On This Topic?

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Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

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