Opinion

Band 5+: When we meet someone for the first time, we generally decide very quickly what kind of person we think they are and if we like them or not. Is this a good thing or a bad thing

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Generally, each time an individual come in contact with a person for the first time, we hastily tend to decide what qualities they could posess and if we can develop a positive feeling for them or not. concluding some one you meet for the first approach could be justified based on psychology. However,there is much more to look out for on this such as ones health condition at a particular time.This essay will decide the good and bad associated with this character and why i strongly stand the opinion that this is a bad thing.

There is no doubt how often humans have been able to ascertai individuals character with the abilities of the study of human. For instance, those who studied psycholohy or human related courses in the university often say a few things about people they meet which in most cases turns out to be true.

One major reason why humans are not to be justiffied by their first aproach is because ones health condition at a particular time can affect behavior which could lead to misconception by people around him or her.Example, it is medically proven that fatty liver can cause a patient to be weak. coming in contact with such a client in your organisation for the first time, one would conclude such a person to be physically unfit for demanding job opportunity.

In conclusion though this can be argued by some group of persons who believe this is not a bad idea because their own reasons based on reaserch etc, i strongly believe this is a bad thing as there are so many things that can contribute to ones mood and character at a particular time such health conditions.

Word Count: 284

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

first: 4

could: 3

health: 3

particular: 3

character: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The essay addresses the main parts of the prompt by discussing both the good and bad aspects of forming quick first impressions, and it presents a clear position that this is a bad thing. However, the development of ideas is limited and not always clear. The argument about psychology is mentioned but not sufficiently explained or supported. The example about fatty liver and job fitness is relevant but lacks clarity and depth. There are also issues with grammar, spelling, and sentence structure that affect the overall coherence. To improve, focus on developing each main idea with more specific examples and clearer reasoning. Ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and that the essay flows logically from one point to the next. Additionally, proofread for spelling and grammatical errors to enhance clarity.

Coherence & Cohesion

The essay has a clear overall structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, the flow of ideas is sometimes disrupted by awkward phrasing and unclear connections between sentences. For example, the transition from the first body paragraph to the second is abrupt. The introduction could be more focused, and the conclusion could better summarize the main points. To improve, work on using linking words and phrases more effectively to guide the reader through your argument, and ensure each paragraph has a clear central idea.

Lexical Resource

The essay attempts to use a range of vocabulary, such as 'ascertain', 'misconception', and 'justified', but there are several errors in word choice and spelling (e.g., 'posess' should be 'possess', 'ascertai' should be 'ascertain', 'justiffied' should be 'justified', 'aproach' should be 'approach', 'reaserch' should be 'research'). The phrasing is sometimes unnatural, like 'concluding some one you meet for the first approach'. To improve, focus on using more precise and natural vocabulary, and proofread carefully to eliminate spelling mistakes. Reading more academic texts can help build a stronger lexical resource. Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The essay contains several grammatical errors that affect clarity. For instance, subject-verb agreement errors ('an individual come' should be 'an individual comes'), incorrect verb forms ('concluding' should be 'concluding about' or 'judging'), and missing articles ('a patient to be weak' should be 'a patient to feel weak'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, such as missing spaces after periods and commas. To improve, practice using a variety of sentence structures (simple, compound, complex) correctly, and pay close attention to basic grammar rules like subject-verb agreement and article usage. Proofreading for punctuation errors will also help.

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