Cause And Solution

Band 5+: Youth unemployment is increasing in many countries in the world. What do you think are the main causes of this problem and what measures can be taken to solve the problem?

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It is prevalent issue now, the level of joblessness is significantly increasing in many countries.This issue is mainly caused by the rapid population growth and a lack of job skills.This issue can be addressed by generating more employment opportunities to match population growth and by encouraging young people to develop new skills.

To begin with, one of the most compelling reason of the unemployment among young individuals is rapid population growth.In many countries, when population suddenly escalate, due to the limited economny resources ,the government cannot fullfill create more job opportunities.This consequently leads to joblessness in individuals.One more particularly noteworthy factor is a lack of job skills in youth.Now a significant number of individuals just a a piece of paper which just their degree of education, but they do not have practical experience in their hands.As a result, they are not able to secure any job in most of the companies, not only at national but also at international level.For instance, in pakistan, 80% young generation have prestigious degrees, but due to not enough skills and practical exposure, they find difficulty in getting job.Therefore, these two factors contribute in the joblessness among adolescents.

To tackle this growing trend, firstly government should invest to boost its economy.So that more companies and organizations are built.This will definatley provide vaccancies for young individuals.Secondly, juveline should learn skills during their education time period.This helps them to have practical experience, and get get easily job when their complete their education.For example, in most developing countries, Germany and the united kingdom, they tend to focus to aquire basic skills during studies of youth, which remarkably assits them to have employment early in their lives.Hence, these above meaures assits to erode this prevaling issue.

In conclusion, although this growing issue caused by the government negligition and lack of skilss in adolescents, this can be overcome by invest more on country’s economy and encouraging individuals to learn skill during their studies.

Word Count: 323

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C2 - Complex
Continue to challenge and refine your language choices.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

their: 7

issue: 4

population: 4

young: 4

skills: 4

joblessness: 3

individuals: 3

government: 3

practical: 3

during: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The essay addresses all parts of the prompt by identifying two clear causes (population growth and lack of practical skills) and proposing two corresponding solutions (economic investment and skill-based education). A clear position is maintained throughout the response. To improve, focus on the depth of idea development; for example, explaining *how* economic investment specifically creates jobs for the youth would strengthen the argument. Additionally, while the ideas are relevant, there are several grammatical errors and issues with word choice (e.g., using 'juveline' or 'adolescents' to refer to young adults, and 'escalate' instead of 'escalates') that, while they do not impede communication, prevent the essay from reaching a higher band. Refining sentence structures and ensuring subject-verb agreement will enhance the overall precision of the response.

Coherence & Cohesion

The essay follows a logical structure with an introduction, body paragraphs addressing causes and solutions, and a conclusion. However, the cohesion is weakened by several mechanical errors and abrupt transitions. Some sentences feel disconnected due to punctuation errors (e.g., comma splices in the introduction). To improve, focus on using a wider variety of cohesive devices and ensure that each sentence flows naturally into the next. Avoid starting too many sentences with simple subjects; instead, use subordinating conjunctions to create complex sentence structures that link ideas more smoothly.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is sufficient to convey the main ideas, but there is frequent repetition of words like 'issue', 'joblessness', and 'skills'. There are also several spelling errors (e.g., 'economny', 'definatley', 'vaccancies', 'juveline', 'assits', 'meaures') and awkward word choices (e.g., 'just a a piece of paper which just their degree'). To reach a higher band, aim for more precise academic vocabulary and ensure correct spelling. Instead of 'piece of paper', use 'academic credentials'; instead of 'get easily job', use 'secure employment more readily'.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

Grammatical errors are frequent and occasionally impede the reader's understanding. There are issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'one of the most compelling reason'), article usage, and sentence fragments. The essay relies heavily on simple sentence structures, and when complex structures are attempted, they often contain errors in syntax (e.g., 'when population suddenly escalate, due to the limited economny resources ,the government cannot fullfill create more job opportunities'). Focus on mastering basic sentence construction, particularly subject-verb agreement and the correct use of relative clauses, before attempting more sophisticated structures.

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