Pie Chart

Band 4+: The following pie charts show the results of a survey into the most popular leisure activities in the United States of America in 1999 and 2009.

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Image for topic: The following pie charts show the results of a survey into the most popular leisure activities in the United States of America in 1999 and 2009.

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The image contains two pie charts representing leisure activities percentages for 1999 and 2009. For 1999: soccer 17%, camping 8%, swimming 13%, aerobics 29%, walking 9%, jogging 5%, bicycling 7%, yoga 12%. For 2009: soccer 18%, camping 3%, swimming 18%, aerobics 31%, walking 9%, jogging 4%, bicycling 7%, weightlifting 10%.

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The chart below illustrates the percentage of extremely famous spare time activities in the United States of America from 1999 to 2009.

Overall,walking in 1999 was the most well known leisure time,but in 2009 it is again stays at the same place. However following chart shows huge changes that swimming reduce nine percent ,on the other hand aerobics provides nine percent over the time .

The spare time in 1999 recieved five percent for yoga which is worst result in the chart.In addition to that the most liked activity is walking with with twenty nine percent . Also bycycling shows twelve and jogging seven percent.However in 2009 yoga increased to ten percent and walking to thirty one ,but bicycling and jogging decreased to seven and three percent

In 2009 we have soccer and swimming with eighteen percent .Also aerobics and camping

Word Count: 141

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Overall Band Score

4.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B1 - Intermediate
Using more sophisticated words could be beneficial.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

percent: 6

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report attempts to describe the pie charts but contains significant inaccuracies and misunderstandings of the data. The organization is unclear, and the language is imprecise, making it difficult to follow the trends and comparisons. To improve, focus on accurately representing the data, organizing the information logically (e.g., by comparing categories or time periods), and using precise language to describe the changes and proportions. The report falls short of the required 150 words.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report lacks clear organization and logical flow. The information is not presented in a coherent manner, making it difficult to follow the trends and comparisons between the two years. Paragraphing is weak, and the transitions between sentences and ideas are abrupt. To improve coherence, focus on structuring the report with a clear introduction, body paragraphs that each address specific aspects of the data (e.g., overall trends, significant increases, significant decreases), and a conclusion. Use transition words and phrases to connect ideas and ensure a smooth flow of information.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is basic and repetitive. There is an attempt to use synonyms (e.g., 'spare time activities' for 'leisure activities'), but the range is limited. Some word choices are not entirely appropriate (e.g., 'extremely famous,' 'worst result'). To improve lexical resource, try to use a wider range of vocabulary related to trends, comparisons, and proportions. Use a thesaurus to find more precise and varied words. For example, instead of 'huge changes,' consider using 'significant shifts' or 'notable differences.'

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains numerous grammatical errors, including incorrect verb tenses, subject-verb agreement issues, incorrect preposition usage, and sentence structure problems. These errors significantly impede understanding. To improve grammatical range and accuracy, focus on mastering basic grammar rules and sentence structures. Proofread carefully for errors in verb tense, subject-verb agreement, and article usage. Practice writing simple sentences and gradually incorporate more complex structures as your accuracy improves.

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