Letter

Band 5+: You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. You would like to buy some electrical goods at a shop in a nearby town. Write a letter to the shop and ask if they have the things you want or whether they will be able to order them. Ask what the prices are and how long they will be able to hold the goods for you. You should write at least 150 words.

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Dear Sir/Madam,

I am writing this letter to enquire about the Crusher ANC2 and Iphone 16 pro that i want to purchase is available or if it is not then would you be able to place an order for me.

Actually, I am searching for it from too long because I have a flaw with my current iphone 11 and it creates annoyance for me sometimes and also I need headset for my training sessions and zoom meetings. But, in the market all the stores only have Iphone 17 pro which is higher than my budget and Crusher without active noise cancellation that is not worth it for me. I really appreciate if you also provide me the expected total price for both of them. So that, i can pay you some amount of money to confirm my order.

If you place an order until tommorrow then how long it would take to hold the both products for me and what is expected time of shipment because I am seeking to get it in less time. I can pay extra for it if possible. Please reply me at your earliest convenience.

Thank you for your consideration and time.

Yours faithfully,

Navjot kaur

Word Count: 202

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B1 - Intermediate
Using more sophisticated words could be beneficial.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

iphone: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The letter appropriately addresses all requirements of the task, including inquiries about product availability, ordering options, prices, and holding time. The content is relevant and sufficiently detailed. To improve, ensure a consistently formal tone throughout the letter and avoid overly casual phrasing. Also, pay attention to grammatical accuracy and sentence structure for enhanced clarity.

Coherence & Cohesion

The letter's organization is somewhat unclear, and the flow of ideas could be improved. Consider using more explicit transitions between your requests and explanations to enhance readability. For example, clearly separate the inquiry about availability, pricing, and holding period into distinct paragraphs or sections. Also, avoid run-on sentences to improve clarity.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is generally adequate for the task, but there's room for improvement in terms of precision and variety. For instance, instead of saying 'creates annoyance for me sometimes,' you could use a more specific phrase like 'causes frequent disruptions' or 'presents ongoing technical issues.' Also, vary your word choice to avoid repetition and enhance the overall impact of your letter.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The letter contains several grammatical errors that affect clarity. Pay close attention to subject-verb agreement, correct tense usage, and proper article usage (e.g., 'the' vs. 'a'). Also, be mindful of sentence structure to avoid run-on sentences and ensure that your writing is grammatically sound. Proofreading carefully before submitting your letter can help catch and correct these errors.

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Overall Band Score

Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

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