Letter

Band 5+: You recently went to a concert and thought one of the singers was very good. You want to tell him how you feel. Write a letter to the singer. In you letter Say how you feel about his performance Give details of your musical activities Explain how you would like him to help you with your musical activities.

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Dear David,

I hope you are doing well, I recently got a chance to attend one of your country tour concerts and honestly, I can’t express myself that how electrified you performed on the stage. I never imagined that a person comes from no singing background can achieve such high notes. I’m truely become your fan now.

Also, just for the information, I’m also a performer and I learnt new singing teachnique from your performance with high notes. After the concert, I went home and tried many times the same notes which upgraded my singing to next level.

However, I was hoping that you can teach some of the composition parts. It is really hard for me to excute the tune that comes into my mind. Sometimes I use audio recorder or cellphone to quicky record the tune but it fades away from the memory quickly. Any advice would be helpful for me

Thank you for the inspiration.

Yours Faithfully,

Hari

Word Count: 161

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Overall Band Score

5.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B1 - Intermediate
Using more sophisticated words could be beneficial.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

singing: 3

notes: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The letter appropriately addresses all parts of the task, expressing admiration for the singer's performance, detailing the writer's musical activities, and requesting assistance. The content is relevant and sufficiently detailed. To improve, the letter could benefit from more specific examples or a more elaborate explanation of the musical activities and the type of help needed.

Coherence & Cohesion

The letter is generally coherent, but the organization could be improved. Consider structuring the letter with clearer transitions between the expression of admiration, details of your musical activities, and the request for help. For example, use phrases like 'Regarding my own musical pursuits' or 'In light of your expertise' to guide the reader. Paragraphing is adequate, but could be more effective with topic sentences that introduce the main idea of each paragraph.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary is adequate but could be more varied and precise. While words like 'electrified' and 'inspiration' are appropriate, try to incorporate more specific musical terms or descriptive language to enhance the impact. For instance, instead of 'singing teachnique,' you could say 'vocal techniques' or 'melodic phrasing.' Also, 'excute the tune' could be replaced with 'capture the melody' or 'realize the musical idea.'

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The letter contains several grammatical errors that affect clarity. For example, 'I'm truely become your fan now' should be 'I have truly become your fan now.' Also, 'I learnt new singing teachnique from your performance with high notes' could be improved to 'I learned a new singing technique from your performance, particularly your use of high notes.' Pay attention to verb tense consistency and subject-verb agreement throughout the letter. Also, 'quicky record' should be 'quickly record'.

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Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

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