Multiple Graphs

Band 4+: Task 1: The pie charts show the proportion of users across different age groups on three apps:Twitter, Facebook and YouTube. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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Image for topic: Task 1: The pie charts show the proportion of users across different age groups on three apps:Twitter, Facebook and YouTube. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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The image displays three pie charts detailing user distribution by age group for Facebook, YouTube, and Twitter. For Facebook, the age group percentages are 10-17 at 14%, 18-34 at 29%, 35-49 at 30%, 50-64 at 19%, and 65+ at 8%. For YouTube, the proportions are 10-17 at 15%, 18-34 at 26%, 35-49 at 29%, 50-64 at 20%, and 65+ at 10%. For Twitter, the distribution is 10-17 at 9%, 18-34 at 40%, 35-49 at 29%, 50-64 at 18%, and 65+ at 4%.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The given pie charts illustrate the percentage of individual on the three social networking apps that is Twitter, Facebook and Youtube.

Overall, it is vividly clear that the highest proportion of youth from aged group 18-34 years uses mostly these app whereas that least was used by from people of 65+ aged.

To begin with, the percentage of youth which use Facebook, Youtube and Twitter is 29%, 35% and 40% respectively. 29% of people in between 35-49 was Twitter and Youtube whereas 30% is Facebook. There is a difference of 1% in the proportion of individual of 10-17 years which use Facebook and Youtube and it was 9% for twitter for same aged group.

Moving further, the least use is recorded for old people of 65+ that is 8%, 10% and 4% for using social media apps. From 50-84 aged group individual they use 19% of Facebook, 20% of Youtube and 18% of twitter.

Word Count: 154

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Overall Band Score

4.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B1 - Intermediate
Using more sophisticated words could be beneficial.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

twitter: 5

facebook: 5

youtube: 4

individual: 3

people: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report addresses the main requirements of the task by identifying the highest and lowest age groups across the three platforms. However, there are significant issues with data accuracy and clarity. Some figures are misattributed to the wrong categories (for example, stating 35% for YouTube users in the 18-34 group when the data suggests 26%), and some comparisons are confusingly phrased. To improve, ensure that every data point is strictly mapped to the correct category and platform, and focus on using clearer sentence structures to facilitate comparisons between the three charts.

Coherence & Cohesion

The organization of the report is somewhat logical, but the progression of ideas is hindered by awkward phrasing and poor sentence structure. While you attempt to use cohesive devices like 'To begin with' and 'Moving further', the internal logic of the sentences is often difficult to follow. To improve, focus on grouping data more logically (e.g., by app or by age group) and ensure that each sentence flows naturally into the next. Avoid repetitive structures and ensure that your overview clearly summarizes the main trends without getting bogged down in specific numbers.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is limited and often inaccurate. There are several instances of incorrect word choices, such as 'percentage of individual' instead of 'percentage of individuals' or 'proportion of users'. Phrases like 'vividly clear' are slightly informal for an academic report, and 'old people' should be replaced with more professional terms like 'the elderly' or 'those aged 65 and over'. Try to expand your range of synonyms for 'show' (e.g., depict, illustrate, represent) and 'proportion' (e.g., share, percentage, ratio) to avoid repetition and increase precision. Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

Grammatical errors are frequent and significantly impact the readability of the report. There are issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'percentage... is' vs 'people... was'), incorrect preposition usage (e.g., 'from aged group'), and awkward sentence constructions (e.g., 'that least was used by from people'). Additionally, there are errors in how age groups are described. To improve, practice using complex sentence structures such as relative clauses (e.g., 'The group aged 18-34, which represents the largest share, accounts for...') and ensure that your tense usage is consistent throughout the report.

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Task Response

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Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

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