Letter

Band 5+: A magazine wants to include contributions from its readers for an article called 'The book that influenced me most'. Write a letter to the editor of the magazine about the book that influenced you most. In your letter Describe what this book was about Explain how this book influenced you Say whether this book would be likely to influence other people

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Dear Sir/Madam,

I am writing this letter to share my thoughts about a book which influenced me most, I hope my words would contribute in the coming article.

The book which I read was based on business ideas. It was written by a shark from Shark Tank, named Daymond John and book name is ” Little Daymond Learn To Earn”. It is a story of 12 year boy who want to buy a poster of famous singer. However, he do not have enough money so he started earning money with help of his mother and friends. He follows a business idea to reach his goal and use the skills what he and his friends have already.

It is a book which is written for kids, which teach children about financial literacy and I read this while reading this for my nephew. I had plan to buy my own house, I was lacking in idea and motivation. This book motivated me and give me a path to follow, which helped me to become a house owner in 3 years.

I believe it has power to influence people of all ages with strong concepts used during story such as team work, marketing, communication and accountuing. The major target market of this book was children below age of 14, but it is shocking that people from different demographics biught and used this.

I hope this will help you to add content into your article.

Yours faithfully,

Alex

Word Count: 244

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Overall Band Score

5.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B1 - Intermediate
Using more sophisticated words could be beneficial.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

which: 5

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The letter appropriately covers the requirements of the task, providing a clear description of the book, explaining its influence on the writer, and commenting on its potential to influence others. The content is relevant and sufficiently detailed. To improve, consider elaborating further on specific aspects of the book's influence and providing more concrete examples. Also, ensure consistent accuracy in grammar and word choice throughout the letter.

Coherence & Cohesion

The letter is generally understandable, but the organization could be improved. Consider structuring your letter with clearer topic sentences for each paragraph to guide the reader. Transition words could also be used more effectively to link ideas within and between paragraphs, enhancing the flow of your writing.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, but there's room to enhance it with more precise and varied word choices. For instance, instead of repeatedly using 'influence,' explore synonyms like 'impact,' 'shape,' or 'inspire' to add depth to your writing. Also, try to incorporate more specific details and descriptive language to make your letter more engaging.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The letter contains grammatical errors that occasionally impede understanding. Focus on improving sentence structure and verb tense consistency. Review basic grammar rules and consider using a grammar checker to identify and correct errors before submitting your work. Pay close attention to subject-verb agreement, correct article usage, and proper punctuation to enhance clarity.

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