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Band 5+: Location of dance classes and types of dance classes by age group

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The image shows a pie chart and a bar chart detailing dance classes data. The pie chart displays the location of dance classes: Private studios 48%, School halls (after-school) 24%, Community halls & other 18%, College-based studios 10%. The bar chart indicates types of dance classes by age group, with the number of students: Ballet has Under 11 at 200 and 11–16 at 600; Tap has Under 11 at 100 and 11–16 at 500; Modern has Under 11 at 300 and 11–16 at 400.

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The chart illusrtrates data about place and tiypes of dance classes young people in town in Australia and how offen their attending.

Overall, The biggest location of dance clasess is private studios and the smallest is college based studios. The largest number of students under 11 attending ballet and the smallest attending modern dance. The modern dance is common type of dance for age group from 11 to 16, as opposed to ballet which the most uncommon for this age group.

Location of dance classes are four: the largest is private studios (48 percent), in twice times less is school halls (24 percent). The next part of chart is community halls and others (18 percent) and the last one is college-based studios (10 percent).

There are three types of dance classes: ballet, tap and modern. Ballet has the biggest number of student under 11 (600) and the smallest number of 11 to 16 students (300). The tap has average number of two age group ( about 450 of under 11 and 410 of 11 to 16). The modern class has 310 numbers of students of under 11 and approximately 520 of students 11 to 16.

Word Count: 195

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
A2 - Upper Beginner
Consider using more varied and advanced words.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

dance: 7

studios: 4

number: 4

students: 4

under: 4

ballet: 4

modern: 4

smallest: 3

percent): 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report addresses the task, but there are inaccuracies in the data reported from the bar chart. The writing also contains grammatical errors and awkward phrasing. To improve, focus on accurately reporting the data and proofreading for grammatical errors.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report demonstrates some organization, but the flow of information is not always smooth. The introduction could be more precise, and the overview lacks clarity. Transitions between paragraphs are weak, and the connection between sentences within paragraphs could be improved to enhance coherence. For example, the shift from the overall trends to specific details in paragraphs 3 and 4 needs better signposting. Consider using cohesive devices more effectively to guide the reader through the information.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is somewhat limited and lacks precision. There are instances of inaccurate word choice ('offen,' 'twice times less,' 'average number'). To improve, focus on expanding your vocabulary related to describing data and trends. Use a thesaurus to find synonyms and avoid repetition. Pay attention to the correct usage of prepositions and articles. Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains numerous grammatical errors that affect clarity. Errors include incorrect verb tenses, subject-verb agreement issues, and incorrect use of articles and prepositions. Sentence structure is often awkward and unclear. For example, 'The largest number of students under 11 attending ballet and the smallest attending modern dance' is grammatically incorrect and difficult to understand. Focus on improving your understanding of basic grammar rules and sentence construction. Proofread carefully to identify and correct errors.

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Band 5+: Location of dance classes and types of dance classes by age group

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Answers On The Same Topic:

Location of dance classes and types of dance classes by age group

Location of dance classes and types of dance classes by age group

Location of dance classes and types of dance classes by age group

Location of dance classes and types of dance classes by age group

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