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Band 6+: summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comaprisons where relevant.

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The image presents three pie charts illustrating the percentage of second language classes taken by Australian secondary school students in Adelaide for three different years. In 2012, the language distribution was Mandarin 40%, Japanese 25%, Italian 15%, Indonesian 10%, and Other 10%. The 2014 data shows Mandarin at 45%, Japanese at 30%, Italian at 5%, Indonesian at 5%, and Other at 15%. For 2016, the percentages were Mandarin 55%, Japanese 25%, Italian 3%, Indonesian 2%, and Other 15%.

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This diagram illustrates the ratio of the second language classes taken by the Australian students in three different years. Overall, this data provides information about taking a second language classes by the students of a school in adelaide.

In general, the largest portion of students was interested in Mandarin language. Moreover, Japanes was second largest option in all three years, while the percentage of selecting Indonesian languge declined with the passage of time.

With the start of the period, 40% of students selected Mandarin in the year 2012, this figure then increased to 43% in 2014, followed by a further incline of 10% in 2016. Similarly, 25% of students registered for the course of Japanese language in 2012, this number showed a significant rise to 30% in 2014, and then fell to 25% in 2016.

In comparison, 10% and 15% of students enrolled for Indonesian and Italian Languages, these figures observerd a masssive decline over time to 2% and 3% respectively.

Word Count: 161

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

students: 6

language: 4

second: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report adequately covers the main trends and makes some comparisons. However, there are some inaccuracies in the data reported (e.g., Mandarin in 2014). To improve, ensure all data cited is accurate and consider a more structured approach to comparing the data across the years.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report demonstrates an adequate attempt to organize the information, but the flow could be improved. The introduction is a bit repetitive. Transitions between paragraphs are present but could be smoother to enhance the overall coherence. Consider using more varied cohesive devices to link ideas within and between paragraphs. For example, in the third paragraph, you could use 'subsequently' or 'thereafter' to better connect the changes over time.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is generally appropriate, but there's room for more precision and variety. For instance, instead of 'largest portion,' you could use 'the highest percentage' or 'the majority.' Also, consider using synonyms to avoid repetition, such as replacing 'increased' with 'rose' or 'grew.' Expanding your range of vocabulary will make the report more engaging and demonstrate a better command of the language.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains several grammatical errors that affect clarity. For example, 'Japanes was second largest option' should be 'Japanese was the second largest option.' Also, 'these figures observerd a masssive decline' should be 'these figures observed a massive decline.' Pay close attention to subject-verb agreement, correct tense usage, and accurate spelling. Proofreading carefully will help reduce these errors and improve the overall grammatical accuracy.

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Band 6+: summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comaprisons where relevant.

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Overall Band Score

Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

Answers On The Same Topic:

summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comaprisons where relevant.

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The charts below show average age of men and women retired from work in seven countries in 2004 and 2008. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant

The bar chart below shows the percentages of New Zealand smokers in the age group 18 - 25 years, for the period 2014 - 2018. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Location of dance classes and types of dance classes by age group

The chart below shows the reasons why people travel to work by bike or car.

The graphs below show the number of hours cancadians spend on watching tv from 1990 to 2000

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Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

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