Bar Chart

Band 4+: The bar chart below shows the percentage of New Zealander men and women who did regular physical activity in 2008 across different age groups. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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Image for topic: The bar chart below shows the percentage of New Zealander men and women who did regular physical activity in 2008 across different age groups. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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The image displays a bar graph illustrating percentages of New Zealander men and women engaged in regular physical activity in 2010 across various age groups: 14 to 23 shows 51.7% men, 46.5% women; 24 to 33 reveals 49.2% men, 43.1% women; 34 to 43 indicates 53.1% men, 38.8% women; 44 to 53 depicts 54.2% men, 42.9% women; 54 to 63 demonstrates 52.8% men, 44.7% women; 64 and above presents 47.2% men, 48.1% women.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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Note: Both the topic and the answer were created by one of our users.

The given graph depicts the ratio of new zealander men and women from separate ages who did daily physical activity in 2008.

Overall, the ratio of men daily activities fluctuated in different ages, while the women daily routine of physical exercises increased in 2010.

From fourteen to twenty three age groups men ratio was high with the number of 51.7 and small decrease was in women activities with the figure of 46.9, while the person there age was 54 to 63 an increase was women activities with number of 52.8 percent and men ratio was fell with the number of 44.7.

The individuals there age was between 24 to 63, in this age group of people the activities of male was low as compared to female with the fact of man ratio was under 42 percent and the average of women was 50 percent and the routine of person who was 64 year old had approximately same respectively men and women ratio was 47.2 and 48.1 percent.

Word Count: 167

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Overall Band Score

4.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C2 - Complex
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Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

ratio: 6

women: 6

activities: 4

percent: 4

daily: 3

number: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report generally addresses the prompt but contains inaccuracies and some misinterpretations of the data. The organization is present but could be improved for clarity. To improve, focus on accurately representing the data, ensuring correct figures and trends are identified. Also, enhance the structure by grouping age ranges more logically and providing clearer comparisons between men and women.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report lacks clear organization and logical flow. The overall structure is weak, and the progression of ideas is difficult to follow. Paragraphing is not effectively used to separate distinct points or age groups. Improve coherence by using clear topic sentences for each paragraph and ensuring that each sentence logically connects to the previous one. Use cohesive devices (e.g., conjunctions, pronouns, synonyms) to link ideas and improve the flow of the report.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is basic and lacks precision. There is some inaccuracy in word choice (e.g., 'ratio' instead of 'percentage'). The range of vocabulary is limited, and there is little evidence of sophisticated or natural control of lexical features. To improve, focus on expanding your vocabulary related to describing data and trends. Use a thesaurus to find synonyms and avoid repetition. Pay attention to the specific context and choose words that accurately convey the intended meaning.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains numerous grammatical errors, including incorrect verb tenses, subject-verb agreement issues, and incorrect use of articles and prepositions. Sentence structure is often awkward and unclear, making it difficult to understand the intended meaning. To improve, focus on mastering basic grammar rules and sentence structures. Practice writing simple sentences and gradually increase complexity as your accuracy improves. Proofread carefully for errors and consider using a grammar checker to identify and correct mistakes.

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