Bar Chart

Band 6+: The bar chart below shows the percentage of unempolyed graduates, aged 20-24, in one European country over a two-year period Summarize the information by selecting and reporting main features, and making comparison where relevant

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Image for topic: The bar chart below shows the percentage of unempolyed graduates, aged 20-24, in one European country over a two-year period Summarize the information by selecting and reporting main features, and making comparison where relevant

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The image contains a bar chart titled 'Graduate unemployment by gender, 2008 and 2009', showing the percentage of unemployed graduates aged 20-24 in one European country over a two-year period. Unemployment percentages for (Men, Women) were: Jan 08 (9.8, 8.2); April 08 (8, 6); July 08 (8, 6); Oct 08 (16, 11); Jan 09 (12, 8.8); April 09 (11.5, 5.5); July 09 (11, 9.5); Oct 09 (22, 13.8).

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The bar chart illustrates the percentage of unempolyed graduates, aged 20-24, in one European country , between 2008 and 2009.

Overall, the percentage of men in european country is significantly higher than that of women in same country. The highest levels of unemployment for both groups occurred in october of 2009.

At the beginnig of 2008, the unemployment rate for men stood at around 7%, compare to higher than the figure for women, which was just under 7%. in october, men rate was sharply increased, with approximately 17% , while women rate was no more than 15% in 2008.

A similar pattern is seen in 2009. In january, the unemployment rates for men and women were roughly 7% and 6% respectively. These figure remained fairly stable until July. In the final quarter, both groups experienced a noptable rise. Male unemployment peaked at nearly 15% in October, while the rate for women increased to around 12%.

Word Count: 155

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Overall Band Score

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Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
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Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

women: 5

unemployment: 4

country: 3

october: 3

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Task Response

The report identifies some main features but contains inaccuracies in the data reported. The description of trends is somewhat general and lacks specific details. To improve, focus on accurately representing the data and providing more precise comparisons. Also, ensure that all key features are addressed and that the overall structure is clear and logical.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report presents a general overview and identifies some key trends, but the organization could be improved for better flow. The structure feels somewhat repetitive, particularly in describing the data for each year separately. Consider integrating the data more thematically to highlight overall trends and comparisons more effectively. Transitions between sentences and paragraphs could also be smoother to enhance coherence.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is generally adequate for the task, but there's room for improvement in terms of variety and precision. Some phrases are a bit vague (e.g., 'sharply increased,' 'notable rise'). Try to incorporate more specific and descriptive language to convey the data more accurately. For example, instead of 'sharply increased,' you could say 'increased dramatically' or 'saw a significant surge.' Also, avoid unnecessary repetition of words and phrases.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains several grammatical errors that affect clarity. There are issues with verb tense consistency, subject-verb agreement, and article usage. For example, 'compare to higher than' should be 'compared to,' and 'men rate was sharply increased' needs rephrasing for grammatical correctness. Pay close attention to proofreading and editing to minimize these errors. Focus on using a wider range of sentence structures to improve the overall quality of your writing.

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